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never in my nine lives

“Never in my nine lives” bites off the whole cats have nine lives thing. It’s what you say when something’s so unbelievable, it’s like it never happened, not even once across all nine of your lives.
“Girl, you're crazy if you really think I’m buying that story. Never in my nine lives would I fall for that.
by Opiumbae September 9, 2025
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These all basically mean long story short, or "my word to _____" (which is just being truthful about something)
"Two two's or Four four's or Nine nine's my word, Kyle was chatting to bare shorties"
by KendrickIsTheGoat01 December 26, 2025
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Nine Fifteen

A 30 year old man. Living in his parents basement. With a 9 o'clock curfew. That gets bitched at in front of his friends. With no backbone to talk back.
You didn't get home last night until Nine Fifteen, And I'm not very happy about it!
by Gold Standard 1 January 16, 2025
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What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: 1989-1992 (one thousand and eight nine to one thousand nine hundred and ninety two)
by LeSouffleDeVersailles January 20, 2025
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what I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to perianal abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to perianal abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: Why is six afraid of seven? It is because seven ate nine (2024, the eighth year of solstice)
by LeSouffleDeVersailles January 26, 2025
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Nine Twelve

Anything post 9/11 attack. After 9/11 America became even more sensitive to everything than it already was. Basically the Nine Twelve world is when Karen’s came into existence.

Sub Definition: being mind blown or being bamboozled. Like if you were bait and switched on a date, or your date dined and dashed on you, or you got an extra gratuity feed for dinner AND paid a tip. You got nine twelved.
I can’t believe that lady grabbed the last apple! She may as well have shot my child. “Oh don’t be so nine twelve (9/12) about it. It’s just an Apple.”
by Myles Payne January 28, 2025
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