False Metal

A crappy mallcore excuse for metal. False metal is commonly listened to wannabee teens who think it's so BR000TAL. It is commonly misclassified as "extreme metal" when it is just poser music, not even real metal. Examples are Suicide Silence and Cradle of Filth.

scene kid: z0mg ss aND c0f r soo br00tal extreem medal!!
Real metal head: No, that's called false metal or poser music. Go back to hot topic.

by abc23355sab December 19, 2009

Southern Metal

Pretty much HxC (hardcore) Lynard Skynard. Metal country music.

Bands like Yosemite Mudflap, Maylene and the Sons of Disaster. Everytime I Die. This is southern metal.

by Jon Henderson December 21, 2008

hair metal

Music made by and for the hypocritical , full-of-shit , "happy-go-lucky" selfish assholes that modern society breeds. Isn't it funny how the majority of everyone of Hair-"Metal"'s supporters here could not go about defining it without making some sort of crude comment regarding grunge ? This "music" is what often gives "metal" a bad name making people associate it with "badassery" , being total assholes, caring only for themselves and their family/friends (which in my opinion is no different than caring for oneself),those who are violent for boastful intents, and sheer idiocy. This music truly is all about the beer/action/bitches regardless of whether that is the stereotype applied to it. It gives bad names to Thrash metal , and generally listeners of this genre brand other subcategories of metal such as Death "psychotic" , "twisted and sadistic" or something of that nature , when they cannot see that their own lifestyles based solely on greed and personal acquisition/gain are a twisted form of apathetic...bitchiness. Those who "live" by the hair metal code can go fuck their ego-inflated avarice-ridden bloated asses on a plate of scorching coals.

Hair Metal guy:Hey punk, what you tryin to pull with my woman ?
Person who bumped into girl on accident: Sorry, It was an accident =/.
Hair Metal guy: You layin your hand on my woman ! I'm gonna kick your ass !!!
Person : Dude it was an accident...sorry.
Hair Metal guy : (starts beating on person for no apparent reason)
Karma : * Hair metal jerkoff is engulfed in flames and slowly and painfully burns to death while razor-sharp rapiers slowly tear through his weak flesh as a gigantic hand crushes his thick skull*
Person: haha , fucker.
Karma : ^_^. Kthxbai.

by ThrasherZero December 30, 2004

nu-metal

whoever said nu metal is happier than real metal is a moron. nu metal is all about being sad because your parents hate you for dressing and singing like a fag. who can blame them?

Recipe for nu-metal:
Take 1 cup real metal, empty out talent, meaning, and originality. Your dish is complete.

by Anonymous June 25, 2003

Troll Metal

Extreme or Melodic Black metal about TROLLS, not about anything else particular, Troll Metal can be ambient music also. Such bands can be looked upon websites for mass media purposes. Such as Mortiis(NOR), Trollmann Av Ildtoppberg(UK), Troll(NOR), and the Godfather of Troll Metal itself, Arckanum. More Troll Metal bands are coming into play soon.

Man check out that sick Troll Metal music!

by Shroem September 3, 2008

Nu Metal

Nu Metal is suppossed to be the 'new metal' of the new age. Mixing lots of pop-culture into their music and image. Speaking of image, that's basically all they're based around, image. One band that sticks out in my mind is Slipknot. Probably one of the most popular nu metal bands, but as all nu metal bands do, they suck. They're not innovative in any way whatsoever. These bands can hardly play guitar, and most people proclaim the drumming is incredible, when really it isn't at all. Some people also proclaim that the 'new' Slipknot has wonderful and fast guitar solos, but no, they don't have even one. And their most complicated riffs aren't even complicated at all. Anyway, the genre is mostly loved by people who have a wonderful life but for some reason think their life is shit. So they go throughout their life acting depressed, but when someone asks why they're depressed they either say 'Well, because my life sucks.' or 'My parents are the worst.' But in reality they have good lives and their parents are the some of the best. Or they're just spoiled so much to hell and back that they don't know anything. You 'nu metal' bastards need to quit listening to your Slipknot and go listen to some Megadeth, or a real metal band that has talent. Such as Megadeth, as I said before, Opeth, And Oceans, At The Gates, Thyrfing, Rhapsody, Dimmu Borgir, or Children of Bodom. Don't just listen to the damn same shit all over again like all these new nu metal bands that the record companies keep shooting out their ass every month. All the bands sound exactly the same, like I said before, they're not innovative whatsoever.

Person 1: Hey I'm depressed, and my parents treat me like shit.
Person 2: Oh no, another life ruined by nu metal! Hurry little man, lets bring you to charter before it's too late!
Person 1: But I've been listening to Slipknot for over a year now.
Person 2: Sweet jesus!! *shoots him* That poor boy, he was so young, but yet so corrupted... CURSE YOU NU METAL!! *raises fist*

by Flamez_Hedgehog June 22, 2004

nu-metal

Subgenre of rock that often involves elements of hip-hop (sometimes) and hard rock that ends up coming out with a beat and riff mixed music masterpeice that is popular among people who aren't jealous of success. Nu-metal often involves the most post-work in rock because of extra elements besides the same guitar-bass-drum-singer combo.

Some nu-metal rock artists include Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park, System of a Down, etc.

by Sithian December 6, 2003