Nonce

A very nice person who is good with kids

American- “hi are you a nonce.”
British person- “yes. I can look after your children for you.”
American- “thank you.”

by Bowis_daydream6696 March 11, 2023

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Nonce Nuggets

Werthers Originals sweets, sold in small boxes or bags. Purchased by the elderly, especially in a Petrol Stations. Great queue former, as they are usually placed right on the bottom shelf and it takes the elderly a fucking age to get up and down. Poor replacement for Simpsons travel sweets that are rarer than rocking horse shit at the moment, so much so there is no shelf space for them, great source of entertainment for an overworked and underpaid customer assistant!

“Three packs of nonce nuggets and a lucky dip for Saturday night.

“Certainly, and are you going to pay for that Daily Mail you’ve got folded under your arm or are you going to walk out with it like you did last week.?”
“Oh sorry, and by the way your forecourt is disgusting why aren’t you out in the rain sweeping up the puddles?”
“As you can see I’m on my own, and I now have a queue of 12 people, thank you so much, have a wonderful day!”

by Cacker Man April 1, 2023

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fucking nonce

a person who likes kids ally im talking about you

whos that over there

ally the fucking nonce

by fgdhjdfgh May 9, 2025

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Nonce

Means. Nothing now because everyone has been called it at least once

You're a nonce

by Whoknowsaye May 10, 2025

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Fish nonce

A person who goes fishing for "fun". Typically (but not exclusively) an overweight, white male who puts selfies of themselves squeezing their victims on their dating profiles. Known to lie and exaggerate sizes. Enemy of swans.

Have you seen Terry's on tinder? He'll never get a girlfriend using that Fish nonce photo.

by Merciless6 May 14, 2025

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