wank splat

commonly used as an insult but often refered to the very messy end of a wanking session if not using your wank jammies...

guy1:dude that was weak!!
guy2:shut up you wank splat.

i had a wank last night and had wank splat all over my bed and got it on my hand...

by shaun p July 19, 2005

analogue wank

Having to revert to the more traditional methods of masturbation by using "old skool" materials such as books, magazines and rude drawings.

My fucking internet isn't getting connected for another fortnight! I'm gonna have to settle for an analogue wank tonight instead of YouJizz!

by darkh0rse July 2, 2011

extreme wanking

The art of masturbating till near climax. Whereabouts you shout: "Hey mum come here a minute!". You then have the time it take till you mum arrives to finish jacking off and get cleaned up.

by Alex and Rob February 18, 2003

Code Wank

code /ko?d/ kohd noun, verb, cod·ed, cod·ing.
wank /wæ?k/ wangk Chiefly British Slang: Vulgar

Creating code that does not relate to the core purpose of a project. Basically wanking around with peripheral tasks

- source. Dave Fleming

"Lets avoid wasting time with any code wank on this project"

by bluemedia October 22, 2007

Chimp Wank

It is the act of taping ones penis to ones leg with either tape or cling film and wanking with his leg like a chimp.

The main advantage of this is that one can still eat and drink at the same time like a Sir.

Sir 1 "Dude we used so much tape and cling film"
Sir 2 "What having a chimp wank?"

by Bashtoe August 23, 2012

Wank towel

A towel primarily used for collecting semen after masturbation.

Can also be used as a normal towel, to give you that great salty semen smell.

Ross: MAM WHERE'S MA WANK TOWEL

Mum: IT'S IN THA FACKIN WOSH YA FACKIN CUNT

Ross: I NEED A FACKIN WANK

by Wankermeister69 January 9, 2014

Wank Ninja

Someone who is very skilled at wanking covertly in the same room as another person - the master of risky wanking. The Wank Ninja can successfully wank in a number of locations without being detected: in the back of the car with their family, under the table during a meeting, on the sofa next to a friend, etc. The art of the silent finish is vital, as is suppressing any hint of the Orgasm Face.

The other night, my girlfriend totally managed to get herself off three times during dinner with my grandparents - she's such a wank ninja.

by TheWN June 8, 2012