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The Human Version of a Golden Retriever

A person who makes everyone around them happy, does not do anything particularly complicated or stressful, elicits a smile on the faces of others upon the mere mention of their name, and whom people love being around.

Every group of friends and company needs one. In sports, they are referred to as a Locker Room Guy.
Howard: I swear the only thing good about this job is Andy. Every time I am upset or stressed, I go hang out at his desk and feel better.

Alyssa: Ya, he is The Human Version of a Golden Retriever. Management keeps him around for that reason, to sanitize this shit ass job.

Thomas: Smells like shit, tho
by Mike109999 October 2, 2022
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Golden Retriever

A partner who knows how to not further damage you.
"I don't need a therapist, I'm dating a golden retriever."1
by Veebop December 6, 2022
mugGet the Golden Retrievermug.

Golden Retriever

"I was staring at this jogger's Golden Retriever and she called me a pig." - Tim
by "I AM THE ONE WHO POOKS!" July 12, 2018
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Golden Retriever

A simp/beta male with passive traits while dealing with women. Basically, another word for "NICE GUY", tends to be a place holder for a "Real Man" or "Bad Boy" in a woman's life later down the road or after the fact.

Golden Retrievers are VERY stable in relationships and are considered "SAFE" and "BORING". Golden Retrievers will never break your heart and will always stay obedient.

Commonly seen as "INFERIOR" or "LESS" than dominant masculine males. Typically used by women that are "HEALING" or just came out of a "HOE PHASE".
GIRL 1: "OMG...I just went out on a date with Justin on Saturday and he's such a Golden Retriever. I'm in my bad girl era, so I definitely need me a toxic bad boy king like Chad...LOL."

GIRL 2: "What a loser, just keep dating him for his money and free food."

GIRL 1: "Girl, duh."
by theDonWEBB October 2, 2023
mugGet the Golden Retrievermug.

Golden Retriever Greeting

When you give someone a rim job upon meeting them for the first time and have them tell you about their day while eating their ass.
Upon Gary meeting Susan, he asked if he could give her the golden retriever greeting.
by Sluts4SkyDaddy March 2, 2022
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Golden Retriever

A loyal boyfriend who is actually in real love with someone, you call someone your golden retriever when they're loyal and protective
by Psutey September 25, 2021
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