Battered asparagus

A male with a long, thin penis with extra foreskin

Omg , I slept with this guy last night, but he had a battered asparagus :(

by Ladymae March 3, 2018

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Dirty Asparagus

Similar to the Dirty Sanchez however, as referred to in Xbox party chat 5/6/2020 at 2010 hours, a dirty asparagus is when you fuck a chick with a stick of asparagus in her ass and then wipe it on her upper lip.

Hey Rover! It was cool how you gave that bitch a dirty asparagus to get rid of your asparagus pee!

by BillBobBosephus May 7, 2020

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Old lady playin’ squat tag in an asparagus patch

When your homie starts laggin’ behind and starts being lazy as fuck

God damn it Jarvis, quit actin’ like an old lady playin’ squat tag in an asparagus patch and get movin.’

by Don’tbelievethehype August 1, 2020

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Asparagus Juice

It makes your coochie smell nasty. 🤢 🐟

Ew! It smells nasty! Did you drink asparagus juice?

by thatonearabperson101 June 2, 2020

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Asparagus body

You have a “straight” body shape with no curves, you stink but you have layers and your beautiful.

Timmi said softly to Chloe “I love you(y), your body is aparagu(y)s”. (speaking cursive)

Chloe- (stares blankly)

Zack- yo I love your asparagus body, I just want to lay you out like a 2x4.

Emily- My what??

by $helly$shell September 9, 2020

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Asparagus body

You have a “straight” body shape with no curves, you stink but you have layers and your beautiful.

Timmi said softly to Chloe “I love you(y), your body is aparagu(y)s”. (speaking cursive)

Chloe- (stares blankly)

Zack- yo I love your asparagus body, I just want to lay you out like a 2x4.

Emily- My what??

by $helly$shell September 9, 2020

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