spank monkey man

a term used by a wife for her husband because he doesn't get enough sex and has to wank a lot instead.

your such a spank monkey man you fat bastard.

by thistlemuncher May 14, 2011

turquoise monkey

when you do a cumfart whilst out on a walk and your black labrador licks it up

"Hey Charlie, what did you get up to today?"

"To be honest, it's a bit embarassing... I came home from a night out and went for a walk with my black labrador. I was wearing shorts and I did a cumfart, it dripped down my leg and my dog licked it up."

"Oh, so you did a turquoise monkey then?"

by ShirazWindow August 30, 2021

monkeys

Where real scientists say we came from.

According to the Origin of Species, we all came from monkeys.

by God is watching you. July 8, 2017

Monkey Time

A monkey with a AK 47 will come to your house, and destroy the things you love.

Monkey Time: A monkey with a AK 47 came to my house, and destroyed my play-doh boots.

by BobTheBird5 March 6, 2021

Monkey Assholes

Black olives (On a pizza)

I ordered a pizza with pepperoni, sausage, green peppers, onions, and monkey assholes

by x11198109v0 November 20, 2022

Lumber Monkey

Derogatory slang used by Canadian meth heads.

Vince is a lumber monkey.

by Stanksodanky March 27, 2025

The monkey

The racist, religionist, sexist, and homophobic orange monkey I bought at the school sale

The monkey is unlove like normal

by Gaymur September 23, 2019