Colgate Goggles 

A common phenomenon arising at Colgate University in which the attractiveness of the opposite sex (see: intelligent females) is extremely skewed, which often leads to disastrous results in combination with alcohol.

Colgate Student: "Dude, I hooked up with the hottest girl last night."

State U Student: "No way. Show me a picture on Facebook."

...

State U Student: "Dude...that looks like Hilary Clinton with down syndrome."

Colgate Student: "Fucking Colgate goggles."

Colgate Goggles by colgategoggles13 February 26, 2008

moroccan goggles 

Whilst partnering in the 69 position and nearing fruition, the (male) individual on top abrubtly sits up, with the scrotum at the bridge of the nose, one testicle falling naturally into in each eye socket, and quickly finishes himself off, depositing his bounty upon the nose and chin of the individual underneath.

Chris wasn't very pleased with the moroccan goggles I bequeathed this morning.

moroccan goggles by ultimus May 18, 2007

Beard Goggles 

Like beer goggles, but with carnies.

Dude, never going to the circus with beard goggles... ever.

Beard Goggles by La_Tigra January 22, 2010

The goggles! They do nothing! 

A "saying" that originates from sub-human animals (see also hipsters) who claim to like The Simpsons but can't be bothered to actually quote anything accurately. The CORRECT line is "My eyes! The googles do nothing!"

Douche: "The goggles! They do nothing!"

Guy: "Man, what a pretentious douche... if you're going to try to sound clever by spouting pop culture references, you should at least get them right."

Attractive Girl: "You're so right, I'll have sex with YOU now instead of that loser."

The goggles! They do nothing! by Bitch-monkey September 8, 2009

con goggles 

since there is a lack of women at a con what litte amount of women there is suddenly goes up about 3 to 4 numbers on the 1 to 10 scale

example:dude i think i was wearing con goggles yesterday i saw the same girl yesterday at the con she was a nine but after the con the next day i saw her she was a six

con goggles by the ragin asian October 18, 2010

beer goggles 

entirely too drunk and think some one is way hotter then they are.

bro: dude she was so hot!

bro2: you had the worst beer goggles on

beer goggles by mad dog 22 June 14, 2011

Uranium Goggles 

When one places there testicles on a sleeping friends eyes and then wakes them up.

Quick Fred is asleep give him the uranium goggles for when he wakes up.

Uranium Goggles by PigDog69er December 15, 2011