Big Dick Jared

A well built african american with significantly large genitals, so much so that it may be a burden for him.

“Woah babe, your dick is just like big dick jared’s!”

by Jared1337 June 13, 2021

Jared

Typically white male, probably plays golf or tennis, and follows the outfit formula: T-shirt, shorts, Nike socks with white vans. A “Jared” is most likely an asshole who treats women like shit and says “oh shit my bad”

Person 1: oh my god why does he treat me like this
Person 2: because, he’s a “Jared”

by Solocupgirl December 9, 2019

jared vanvleet

A true fuck boy. Normally has a very big head, and a very petite penis. Not to be mistaken for "Jared" Jared VanVleet is a complete douchebag. Also very bad in bed.

You cheated on me, quit being a Jared VanVleet.

by Dictionarywebster June 23, 2016

Jared

An absolute fucking cunt

That guy is such a Jared

You see that dickhead over there? What a Jared.

by PP Monger321 June 8, 2019

Jared's Ears

Jared's Ears is a condition in which your ears are abnormally large. Most would say that they are ticklish because of how big they are. There is no cure for this but one can live with the struggles of Jared's Ears by parting ways with the negatives of its impact.

Dude I have Jared's Ears

Guy: Dont worry bro I dont wanna tickle them

Thanks

by Christophlak May 28, 2024

Jared

This person will make you feel the lightest you’ve ever felt ever! Like a skinny skinny feather. Jared’s are unapologetic and charming with a fantastical sense of humor. He cherishes his friends and treats them like absolute guido/guidette royalty! Obsessed with gorillas and getting sticky and shaking ass.

Jared can simply whip the piss.

by Definedinmylanguage February 2, 2022

Jared

A fat Costa Rican bastard who got a shitty ass haircut and hates a lovely boy named Bryan. Nigga Jared thinks he’s rich ($14 an hour makes fat niggas go crazy) he lies about everything except that he has so many hoes. Nigga thinks he’s a thug cause he live in a shitty ass apartment. The biggest city boy s(as in fat asf but he still a city boy) got pepperoni nipples, SpongeBob acne and is a big fan of chaka culture and claims the chaka set. And he is thankful for god given opportunity’s Jared is a good homie and faithful vato and

Margret: Jared is fine ask
Hannah: I’d let him nut inside of me
Margret:…
The hoes: I’d like Jared to fill my holes

by Chester2fine March 10, 2023