Tim Thomas (the white one that plays hockey)

Goalie for the Boston Bruins. As a top prospect, Tim Thomas was drafted 217th overall in the 1994 entry draft by some team that moved to Colorado. After being drafted, he decided to backpack around Europe for 8 years. Upon his return to the states, he promptly joined with the Providence Bruins of the AHL. After 3 seasons with them, he finally got a job with the Boston Bruins. For 2 seasons he sucked and was outplayed by such stars as Alex Auld and Joey MacDonald. However, he soon found his stride behind a the defensive system of coach Claude Julien. Kicked ass for 2 years, then sucked again and lost the starting job to Tuukka Rask aka Tuukk Nuukkem.

Who was that one goalie that won the Vezina and then lost his starting job the next season? No, not Jim Carey, it was Tim Thomas (the white one that plays hockey).

Tim Thomas (the white one that plays hockey) and Chris Osgood could totally be brothers.

by JFinney08 May 26, 2010

stone two birds with one bong hit

To complete two jobs with one action.

Your girlfriend could calls you up on friday night and provide sex and rent money, that visit from her would stone two birds with one bong hit!

by Chiagulera May 24, 2009

one eyed purple headed yogurt slinger

It's a term for a friggin' dick. Penis. Schlong.

"Stop touchin' my pants like that or my One Eyed Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger is gunna come out and slap you across the face, BITCH!"

by Kay-Cizzle April 24, 2006

One foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel

2 phrases:

"One foot in the grave"- half dead, dying, death is catching up. Tired, old, metaphorical

"Foot on a banana peel"- funny, humorous, cartoon, things are going comically wrong, events are not working in one's favor. *Picture* stepping on a rake and being hit in the face with the handle. Knee slap comedy

One foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel expression-

damned if you do, damned if you don't...

Guy 1: "how are you doing?"
Guy 2: *expression meaning* on one side (one foot) I've really gone to hell, or im working on getting there- and on the other side (other foot) it's pretty stupid, but entertaining to watch, the bullshit that's been happening to me or that I've been outing putting myself through...

"Falling apart and it's hysterical to witness"

by GoldieGal April 12, 2019

One in the baby maker, three in the brownie baker

One finger (primarily a thumb) in the vagina, three fingers in the butt-hole

Dude I was so drunk and she was so horny, so I for some reason put "One in the baby maker, three in the brownie baker" - This term was originally coined in a drunk-dial voicemail to a special friend after a night of drinking and after-partying in a hot tub with a naughty french girl.

by Bryan "DJ Kenn"/Will da Thrill January 12, 2009

fuck up a one car funeral procession

this is for the complete lamo that most likely doesn't have 2 brain cells to bounce together. If you think about a funeral procession, and how it takes a little bit of effort to keep it organized...now pare it down to one car, yes, just one car - the idiot him/herself.

That moron could fuck up a one car funeral procession.

by grataballi October 23, 2005

willy the one eyes jungle worm

The largest cockasourus know to man who only ate baby's feet. It was known to swallow women whole to in pregnant them. It was always horny.

For example a tall man walkin down the street who sees a women drags her Into a ditch and rapes her will be called "willy the one eyes jungle worm"

by Jim's girl <3 February 4, 2014