No-No Towel

A towel used to absorb bodily fluids during sex.

Bonus points if there’s blood AND cum on it.

“Ah fuck, my roommate found the no-no towel.” - John
“Don’t worry man Derek is chill. He probably just threw it in the wash” - Jake

by Rocky 4 Lyfe September 7, 2020

towel-toss

Noun. The act of throwing a clean-up towel to the person covered in cum during the awkward, post-orgasmic bliss. Sometimes the towel-toss is reduced to throwing the nearest piece of clothing that can be found.

That guy I just fingered looked pretty hot laying on my bed as I did the towel-toss.

by upwithbuck April 20, 2014

buying towels at ross

a code word only cool people can use for saying they are taking a shit

Valerie - I’m currently buying towels at ross
Carolina - same ;)

by señor spermies September 22, 2017

towel law

The unspoken rule that towels' rights are less than any other person's, excluding towels themselves. Towels are not allowed to:
1. Read
2. Write
3. Vote
4. Drive
5. Leave their designated area
6. Dry anything their masters say not to
7. Disobey a master's orders
8. Smoke, drink, or have other substance-related activity
Towels are subhuman filth.

Thanks to Towel Law, the towel was punished sternly by the whip for attempting to write a book about how to drive, against Amy Schumer's vagina's wishes. It was quickly rolled into a makeshift dildo-tampon and shoved back in. Amy Schumer stopped menstruating a long time ago, so don't worry. It's just super sweaty and gross.

by Niger Tits October 9, 2017

Towel-Shank

The act of wrapping up a towel then smaking someone with it.

Don't make me towel-shank you

by Tavi/PinkPowderCandy April 1, 2024

Towel scrubbing

The act of using half a hollowed out cucumber as a dick sheath and the other half as an anal dildo while motioning as if drying your taint with a towel.

All this towel scrubbing has used up all my cucumbers

by Cucumber sheath June 11, 2018

Wet paper towel

The wet paper towel is an annoying phrase in UK schools. Particularly middle and primary. That feeling when you tell your teacher to go call the nurse because you have got a really sore leg and the nurse just gives you a WET PAPER TOWEL and expects it to be better is just so unbelievable.

Miss can you call the nurse?

Nurse comes...
My leg hurts

Nurse gives wet paper towel. bye!!
Me in head: how tf...

by What ya dickhead July 26, 2024