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Redneck Wet Wipe

When you're on the toilet taking a mean shit and you realize you have to blow your nose, so you grab some toilet paper to do so, then wipe your asshole with the now-wet and snotty toilet paper, thereby cleaning your asshole more effectively than just regular shit tickets. The best part is, unlike regular wet wipes, you can flush it without fucking up your septic tank or local sewage system.
Wife: "Honey, do we have any wet wipes? I've got the never-ending wipe happening here."
Husband: "Just blow you nose into some toilet paper!"
W: "Huh?"
H: "You know, like a Redneck Wet Wipe!"
W: "Gross, babe."
H: "Is it really any more gross than what just came out of your asshole?"
W: "Fair point." *honk*
by Crap-tain April 20, 2025
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San Francisco wet wipe

When you take a messy shit but don’t have any wet wipes. So you jerk off into the toilet paper and wipe your ass
That shit was so messy I had to use a San Francisco wet wipe
by Damon184 June 11, 2025
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Alaskan Wet-wipe

To be used while brushing your teeth and shitting: spitting your toothpaste onto the toilet paper before wiping.
Why are you crying?

I just used an Alaskan wet-wipe

What’s cooler than being cool?
An Alaskan wet-wipe
by Tim the word man July 1, 2023
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Wet wipe

Someone who always complains and moans about every and anything!
Ashley is a wet wipe who doesn't like to socialise
by Cornfedmaster July 5, 2023
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whataburger wet wipe

A whataburger wet wipe is when you eat a big Gothic Mexican chick's ass in the bathroom of a whataburger in Austin, Texas, and use your texas toast from your patty melt to wipe the poo-jaculate off your face.
"Hey babe, I wanna try a whataburger wet wipe, you down?"
"Sure, what is that though?"
by Joji_666 February 13, 2024
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Florida wet wipe

When you piss on your sock before wiping your ass with it.
I done had to poo but ain't had no toilet paper. Blessed me for the ol Florida wet wipe!
by StupidGood March 30, 2024
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