monkey blocker

similar to cock blocking except used in instances where you are prevented from masturbating or "spanking your monkey"

shawns wife and kid are huge monkey blockers.

by w00t_vantuckey February 12, 2008

dusted monkey

being so high that you can barely function and tweaking out.

I was just with him before. He's dusted monkey!

by ZachMUT January 17, 2017

Butter the Monkey

Actions that result in a woman being ready for penetration.

I whispered something in her ear. By the way she wiggled, shifting her weight, I knew that I had just helped her butter the monkey.

by cherrypicker, uk June 06, 2009

Monkey Tea

Normal tea, made from a tea bag that isn't a specific blend (eg Earl Grey or green tea). Comes from the Cimpanzees that were used in TV adverts for PG Tips.

"What type of tea would you like? Earl Grey, Chamomile?"
"Nah, monkey tea will do fine thanks"

by NZ Gary January 13, 2010

Monkey Gut

“The name for your stomach after you eat a huge meal that causes your gut to bulge out and stager around like a monkey.”

“Aaaaah, I got monkey gut so bad I’m afraid Jane Goodal gonna try to study me.”

by Alibaster Slim August 06, 2012

Meditating Monkey

A person who remains calm in the midst of crisis or chaos.

All hell is breaking loose. Call in Bob. He's the designated Meditating Monkey

by Rastus McGee February 27, 2018

Revo Monkey

Used to insult a man who bends over backwards to try and get female attention. Short for reverse monkey. A monkey walks with it's "hands" in front of them, but if someone is bending over backwards they put their hands behind them for support. It could also tie into them being spineless.

She asked for someone to get her beer, and he brought over a whole case! What a revo monkey.

by Ragnex March 24, 2005