The Haggis

Someone's overbearing mother.

The haggis is going off on one again

by Haggis offspring February 14, 2025

Irish Haggis

A peppery flavored comedian bearing a crumbly texture and a brackish aftertaste who leads with homogenous humor and lacks overall comedic substance. Her neeps & tates are known to have scared the evil out of an entire legion of demons who immediately converted to Taoism then fled to a remote cavern located in the center of a Nepalese mountain. Those demons created a trauma recovery center where they are reported to self treat. The Irish Haggis finishes all her “jokes” with the same punchline every time; Donald Trump.

(see www.rosie.com for comedian’s photo).

The Irish Haggis, imported from America and introduced to Ireland doesn’t fool the locals. It’s the same old Haggis in new packaging.

by LA Wise July 19, 2025

Boiled Haggis

When a woman is on her period and she queef-Dutch-ovens herself.

It brought a single, burning tear to her eye when she let rip an ol' boiled haggis; she emerged from under the comforter, a shell of her former self.

by SuxbridgeMA November 3, 2025

shagging the haggis

Having sex with sheep.

Look at Johnny out there in the field shagging the haggis. What a pervert!

by anonymous1717 October 15, 2016

Cum Bag Haggis

An old Scottish person of whomst N U T S while eating his favorite meal

Hey Cum Bag Haggis, can I have some?

by A whole bundle o' gay June 15, 2018

Schrödinger’s Haggler

Someone who exists in a state of contradictory negotiating behavior until observed (i.e., called out): simultaneously outraged at by lowball offers when they’re selling (because “that’s unfair!”), and aggressively lowballing others when they’re buying—both states coexisting in perfect hypocrisy until the contradiction is pointed out and the reality collapses into obvious double standards.

That guy on Marketplace is a total Schrödinger’s Haggler—he flips out and calls you cheap for offering $50 on his $200 listing, but then turns around and lowballs every seller he messages by 70% like it’s nothing

by Vothanus February 20, 2026