Jared

A guy that gets absolutely no maidens. No bitches. No damsels. No female significant other. Or male significant other, for that matter. He gets nobody. He is alone, and will forever be alone. He loves Friday Night Funkin' and anime, and watches them nonstop.
Hopefully, someday, he will find that special someone.

*at a party*
"Yo you seen my boy Jared?"
"Nah he's at home playin FNF."
"Damn that's too bad."

by Drexsanity November 4, 2022

Jared

A simple man resembling a cave man. He enjoys making others salty while he himself is the saltiest of them all, hailing from Salt Lake City. He does not understand adult jokes and goes into extreme shock when he sees a curse word. Jareds can often be found being nursed by wild Conners, who then proceed to eat them.

Nobody wants to be a Jared.

by BlackPoker June 8, 2018

Jared’s girlfriend

Jared’s girlfriend is a fucking weirdo. She looks like shrek or something and absolutely nobody likes them. She smells really bad and everyone talks about it behind her back. Jared feels bad but he kind of likes it

Is that Jared’s girlfriend

Oh fuck yeah it is hide. Can she just fuck off

by J123345 March 4, 2025

Jared daniels

Someone who is a good friend and loyal

(Guy 1) Mans is a G, he always here for me
(Guy 2) he a jared daniels

by Hockeyeurs February 10, 2020

Jared

A guy who is 19 and cannot read.

Teacher:Jared read paragraph 8.
Jared:No I cannot, whats up I'm Jared and I'm 19 and I never learned how to read.

by VINES ARE MY LIFE April 16, 2020

Jared

A guy who thinks he has it all and brags about it. He claims he is the best and complains about everything and anything you do that ”he doesnt like” But his imence Stupidity says otherwise

Oh that dude is such a Jared

by MannyVK September 7, 2020

Jared

a misogynistic douchebag who doesn't know how to take a hint, but when he does he gets pissed off at you. he also has terrible road rage, and can't complete simple tasks over and over without getting irritated i.e. has zero patience. the kind of guy who will take you on a date as more than friends when it actually is just a friend date and will ruin your favorite music with memories of how he let his attraction to you get in the way of allowing you to have a good time.

wow did you hear what he did to jessica? what a jared.

by mikayla29102 May 5, 2019