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Meconium Clout Syndrome

When the sperm donor (father) of a moments-old newborn baby is far to preoccupied with posting photos and videos of himself and his exhausted, disheveled baby-mama to give a single visible shit about their newborn child, her welfare or the enormity of this moment in his life. Not infrequently he is making jokes about the birthing process and how he was like "no F-ing way" the whole time and how grossed out he was, "like you can't even believe the mess the birth process makes- so glad somebody's going to clean that up- like seriously, man!" Meconium Clout Syndrome has a very high mortality rate, almost always under very suspicious circumstances.
OB: Congratulations Mom and Dad!! She's a beautiful healthy baby girl and she's all yours!!!
Mom: She's beautiful!!! Aiden, look at your new daughter- she's perfect!
Father: staring into his phone Ok everybody, she just had the baby- like she was screaming and it was so gross- like an alien just squirted out of her- she's a total mess right now- let me get a shot of her pans phone towards mom who looks away and covers her face in embarrassment and exhaustion C'mon babe- smile for my followers!! Look over here! This is going to be the BEST video I've ever posted... This is going to be SO epic!!!
OB: looks at neonatologist} Textbook Meconium Clout Syndrome- a pretty serious case- I'm not sure this guy is going to survive once they get home...
by Asclepius Minora February 15, 2023
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Clout Chaser

Someone who is desperate for internet points (clout)
These people will do anything to gain the internet points(clout) to make themselves look better and more important
"Hey did you see that guy begging for likes, he's such a clout chaser"
by Stormy_Folf February 4, 2021
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Clout

Christian Garcia has clout
by Tayshua May 3, 2018
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clout

when one walks in such ways that he is made a fool of in front of others.
INSERT NAME HERE is a clout.

your'e a clout.
Why?
because you walk like a duck on springs.
by CloutMaster April 19, 2018
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clout clapped

hooking up with someone who is successful, rich or famous, simply for clout.

also counts for relatives of famous people or friends.
"yoooo I just clout clapped Pitbull I cant wait to tweet about this"
by TRASHLEYGARBAGE September 12, 2021
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Clout karma

The feeling others get when responding to your requests based on your public performances and/or notoriety.
Vito: Ryan yu think I should smash this apple on bams head?
Dunns Urn: …$$$$
Vito: Alrighfdtywrraa Idon givafuk what ur sayn ima find Bam
Knoxville: Vito, whatchya up to?

Vito: “raises arm qwith hostility apple in hand”. tell me wher Bams aterallahsmasha and ruin your Clout Karma!
Knoxville: “cowers” my what? WhOa big fella I got money’s,” he says shifty eyed, here take a couple benjis, and lemme see if I can’t “polish” that apple for you” shifts eyes again” just in case you don’t eat it and wanna let Bam have it.
you know how he feels about your body. treat it like you’re in the temples temple, Listening to Tom Templeton. “Grabs apple and wipes his ass with it”
Vito’s dog: *nods* N farts..
Vito: Gimmegrahgagapplekgraplfkpe
Bam runs out of the pantry and starts slapping Don Vito’s bare back while

Knoxville laughs crazily, Vito Pirouettes and smashes apple on Bams sideburn while templetons greatest hits begins to play on a record player near Dunns Urn. Vito’s dog begins dancing and money rains down from the lighting fixtures. Bam wipes apple sauce off his Facebook smirks and says why does this apple smell like shit. Scoops handfuls of money off the ground saying “this feels like enough cash to buy a website and tell people to dive into stuff, but do you think people would willingly just fucking dive into shit because I’m the one asking and I have so much fucking Clout Karma.”

Vito: Of course youfukingknuklhegGdg uratheaBamMaRgera!”
by Medium Robert March 24, 2023
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clout stalin

Guy: “Aye look that’s Clout Stalin
Clout Stalin: “ Droppin soon”
by Clout Stalin May 2, 2018
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