Sometimes called by it's Latin name, 'Terra', The Earth is a super computer designed by Deep Thought, another super computer, and payed for by two pandiminsional beings Loonquawl and Phouchg. This computer was so advanced that others began calling it a 'planet', and soon life itself sprang from it's main matrices. The 'humans', 'Earthlings', etc. that were brought forth were socially adaptible, and had the amazing ability to learn from other's mistakes (and strangely enough, an apparent disinclination to do so). The 'planet' itself was mostly harmless, untill it was demolished to make way for an intergalactic bipass by Vogons (a nastly lot, them), leading to the production of Earth Mk. II, which is where we live today.
Imagine there's no such thing as a cheeseburger.
Now, imagine there's no more McDonald's.
Now, the USD is gone.
Now imagine there's no New York Times.
Good. Now, there's no New York.
Now, there's no East Coast. No West Coast.
Now, and this is the big one, imagine there's no Chuck Norris.
If you could (somehow) follow that last instruction, then the Earth being gone's easy to grasp, no?
Now, imagine there's no more McDonald's.
Now, the USD is gone.
Now imagine there's no New York Times.
Good. Now, there's no New York.
Now, there's no East Coast. No West Coast.
Now, and this is the big one, imagine there's no Chuck Norris.
If you could (somehow) follow that last instruction, then the Earth being gone's easy to grasp, no?
by TabGuy January 3, 2011
The real hell. According to sacred Gnostic texts, has been and will be the darkest planet in the entire universe with more than 70% of it's inhabitants being ether dark or gray spirited. All life will end in 2100.
by *Dee* April 30, 2006
The Alabama of space, we humans are stupid, and no aliens want to live here permanantly, they are only passing through.
by Jiub May 25, 2003
a spherical, lump of shit and piss floating around the Sun at 66,000 mph.
Incidentally, the place sucks the big one.
Incidentally, the place sucks the big one.
by J. Michael Reiter April 30, 2005
the act of consciously connecting to Earth and soaking up the divine energies, mainly through walking in nature barefoot.
by earthangelhannah February 28, 2021
1. A hospitable life-sustaining planet.
2. A flat mass of land that the universe orbits. At least, that's what a whopping 0.01% of the population have come to wrongly believe.
2. A flat mass of land that the universe orbits. At least, that's what a whopping 0.01% of the population have come to wrongly believe.
by Twotorule January 16, 2018
by MrAdemola123 June 17, 2020