Alt: Two Can Jackie Chan
A rather embarrassing (for friends present who are sober / can handle their drink) and woeful condition in which the sufferer changes from a passive to an aggressive personality type having consumed a couple of pints of piss weak lager. The afflicted light weight can be regularly observed in bars and clubs, squaring up to people who are considerably taller, stronger and more adept at martial arts than they are. These 'confrontations' inevitably lead to the 'Two Can' Action Man receiving a swift kicking, necessitating an equally predictable detour to a casualty department. Also seen on execrable Police based TV documentaries adopting unconvincing martial arts poses, a la Karate Kid, in front of bored Police Officers. Just who are you trying to fool? The Police will tazer and break you!!!
A rather embarrassing (for friends present who are sober / can handle their drink) and woeful condition in which the sufferer changes from a passive to an aggressive personality type having consumed a couple of pints of piss weak lager. The afflicted light weight can be regularly observed in bars and clubs, squaring up to people who are considerably taller, stronger and more adept at martial arts than they are. These 'confrontations' inevitably lead to the 'Two Can' Action Man receiving a swift kicking, necessitating an equally predictable detour to a casualty department. Also seen on execrable Police based TV documentaries adopting unconvincing martial arts poses, a la Karate Kid, in front of bored Police Officers. Just who are you trying to fool? The Police will tazer and break you!!!
Mate 1: Jim's been to hospital again!
Mate 2: Yeah the twat! He was round at mine and had two cans of Stella. Next thing you know he tried to chop a brick in half with his hand.
Mate 1: Not as bad as the time he spent two weeks in traction after he had two glasses of cider, decided he was hard and nutted that bouncer in the chest....What a Two Can Van Damme.
Mate 2: Yeah the twat! He was round at mine and had two cans of Stella. Next thing you know he tried to chop a brick in half with his hand.
Mate 1: Not as bad as the time he spent two weeks in traction after he had two glasses of cider, decided he was hard and nutted that bouncer in the chest....What a Two Can Van Damme.
by TheFoolOnTheHillAnarchy October 20, 2012
Get the Two Can Van Damme mug.Dude1: "Carly Simon has a TDM."
Dude2: "A what?"
Dude1: "A TDM - you know,a Two Dick Mouth."
Dude2: "Oh yeah, totally. I wonder if James Taylor ever tested it with a buddy."
Dude2: "A what?"
Dude1: "A TDM - you know,a Two Dick Mouth."
Dude2: "Oh yeah, totally. I wonder if James Taylor ever tested it with a buddy."
by Coosey Junt December 14, 2013
Get the two dick mouth mug.Related Words
by neverlad January 23, 2014
Get the two tub man mug.It is often used as a way to dismiss the threat of an aggressor by saying, "This is a two-hit fight."
by Silent Barracuda February 27, 2014
Get the two hit fight mug.A person or the act of one upping. For example " I saw a train crash the other day! " "oh yeah? I saw 2 trains crash one time! Talk about incredible!" The person claiming the 2 trains crash is a "two trainer". His act of telling the story is "two training"
Ken always two trains me. Every time I tell a story, he's done it better or seen it done more amazingly .
by Bliss savage February 28, 2014
Get the Two Train mug.The act of placing an opaque bag on your sexual partner's head, due to them being very unatractive but having a nice body, and putting a similar bag on your head also, incase the bag on their head falls off. This is used in reference to someone who is very ugly or unattractive, but has a sexy body.
"When I had sex with Jenny I had to texas two-bag, because she's so ugly"
"Would you fuck our teacher?" "Yah, but shes a bit of a texas-two bag."
"Would you fuck our teacher?" "Yah, but shes a bit of a texas-two bag."
by Chetanator October 11, 2014
Get the Texas Two-Bag mug.In the stall of any public restroom begin to fuck a girl in the ass, sit down on the toilet with her on your lap and shit and cum at the same time.
Man! That crazy bitch at the bar last night wanted me to pull off an "Albert Two-holes and the Sweet Release". I'm not sure who's shit I was smelling, mine, hers or the 300lb fatty in the stall next door. Wow, Amazing!! For my first time trying it, it was a sweet release!
by Russell Upsomgrub June 5, 2014
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