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Thirty Finger Handjob 

A handjob, as the name implies, consisting of thirty fingers. Your significant other purchases finger puppets 🤚🏼 for each finger and puts them all on prior to initiating a handjob. They then give a rigorous sensory overload handjob with 30 fingers for increased pleasure...think of it is as the ribbed condom of handjobs.
My girlfriend wanted to up her handjob game. So she decided to bust out the thirty finger handjob to bring it to the next level...so many fingers fro so much pleasure.
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barley a handjob 

I gave him a handjob but barley! So I gave him barley a handjob

Hamburger Helper Handjob 

The process of filling a white glove with warm meat, cheese and noodles then proceeding to insert your hand to then give someone a handjob.
Person 1: I heard Bonnie gave Kevin a Hamburger Helper Handjob last Monday.
Person 2: That shit is wild, they couldn't even wait till a Tuesday!

Person 3: I'm so horny, I think I'm gonna give myself a Hamburger Helper Handjob tonight.
Person 4: That's disgusting bro why the fuck would you say that to me.

Schrödinger's handjob 

When you are asleep and having a wet dream, and you're not sure where it is a dream or whether it's your best mate wanking you off when you're sharing a bed
Ben woke up in pure euphoria and a wet patch, he rolled over to his best friend blake sleeping next to him. His euphoria swiftly turned to shock and exclaimed "oh fuck, I've had a Schrödinger's handjob"

double-stacked handjob 

To use both hands to stroke when giving a handjob.
Last night was crazy, my girlfriend gave me a double-stacked handjob!

Battle Creek handjob 

A Battle Creek handjob is when your getting a handjob while simultaneously fingering your own ass hole
yeah I got me a Battle Creek handjob behind the bowling alley

Madam's handjob 

When a woman removes her underwear and uses it to give a guy a hand job so that the panties soak up the cum, similar to a posh wank.
She took her pants off in the car and gave me a madam's handjob
Madam's handjob by Space_Ashe March 24, 2025