Life

A sexually transmitted disease that always ends in death. There is currently no known cure. The only way to prevent creating the disease is to have protection. The best way of preventing it is by using condoms, birth control pills, or just not having sex.

Did you hear that bill and sandy gave life to that baby? How horrible! It has to love like with it for its whole life!

by Ash Drowning June 24, 2014

Shrek is love, Shrek is life

I👁️WAS ONLY🎂9 YEARS🎂OLD👵😍😍😍
I❤️LOVED❤️👹SHREK💚💚😳SO MUCH, I HAD👏👏ALL👏👏THE MERCHANDISE💰🤑AND🎬🎬MOVIES💚😱🙀😱😱
I PRAY🙏TO🥵SHREK🥵😀👍EVERY NIGHT😴🛏️🌙BEFORE BED🥱,THANKING💕HIM💕FOR THE👶LIFE🐣I’VE🥹BEEN🫘GIVEN😘💋💕😎
💚"😍SHREK🥰💚IS💕LOVE❤️❤️💋",I👀📣SAY🗣️,"😭😱SHREK🥵🥰IS🟰🛟LIFE🐣"👏👏👏💋
MY👴DAD👴HEARS👂ME🤔😬😱AND☎️CALLS📞ME😟🙂 ↕️🤔A🌈🌈FAGGOT🏳️ 🌈🏳️ 🌈😱😱
I KNEW🧠💀HE🫶WAS JUST🫣🥶JEALOUS🫥FOR🍀🍀🍀🍀🤗MY💕❤️LOVE❤️💕OF😎💕SHREK💕😘💚🥰🤩😭😎
👉I👈📢CALLED📞😡👴HIM🤬🤮A🍑CUNT👩😂😂🤣🤣😈
HE🤡✋SLAPS👏💥ME😭AND SENDS👉👉ME🫥💔TOGO🚶TO SLEEP🛏️🥱😓😱😬🥦🐫
I’M😭CRYING😢💦NOW📆,AND➕MY FACE🥺😭😵 💫HURTS😰😩🤬😡🪦💀
I🤓LAY🛏️IN🌕BED😴AND💔ITS🧊❄️🥶REALLY COLD❄️🥶🫥💩🟩
A💕🔥WARMTH😱❤️IS💘➡️MOVING➡️👉TOWARDS ME👈😱🤯😨🤯🥰
I🧑 🍼FEEL😑😘😱❤️SOMETHING💕🤯✋TOUCH🥹ME😍😍😍🙂 ↕️
ITS❤️🥰😍SHREK🥰🥵💚❤️💕😎💪😭😊🤩😈😈
✋I✋AM😃😅😁SO HAPPY😄😁😆😘❤️😎💚💚
💚💚HE💚💚🤐WHISPERS😏IN😅MY EAR👂🌽,“👉THIS👈IS☠️❤️MY SWAMP💕☠️”😂🤣🤣💕
HE😘😇👌GRIPS🤛😘🥹ME🥹WITH🥹💕🥰HIS💚😅🥵😎POWERFUL💪💪💪👹OGRE🟢🙌HANDS💚✋AND PUTS😍ME😌ON MY HANDS✋✋AND KNEES🧎🤗🥵😭😭😭
😇I’M🪽READY💪😍🥵🥵🥵💀🥹😬
I👁️⬅️SPREAD➡️MY😣🥵🍑✌️ASS🫏CHEEKS🍆🍑FOR💚😍😘SHREK🤪😱😬💕😨💚💚💚💚💚
💪😎HE💕💕🏹🍆PENETRATES🏹MY😫😖😫😖😫😖BUTTHOLE🍑🕳️😡😃🤪🥵😭😔😏💕
IT HURTS😫😵😪😱😱SO MUCH😱😱BUT🍑I🍆🍑DO IT🥰💕💕FOR😘😍💚SHREK💚😖🥵🤫🥴😃😃🥺
I🇨🇦CAN🥫🥹FEEL MY🥹🥰BUTT🍑😭TEARING🥵💕AS😿MY EYES👀START✨TO💧💧WATER😓😢🥵💚🥵🥰🥰
I PUSH➡️➡️💘AGAINST😱HIS😍FORCE💪💪🥵🥵😤😳
✌️I😬WANT😬TO PLEASE🥺💚🥺SHREK🥵😘👐😇😍💚💚💚
😌😇HE💚💕ROARS A😡😡💪MIGHTY ROAR🫨🤤AS💚HE😍💧FILLS💚MY🍑BUTT🍑WITH HIS💕💗LOVE💘🍆💕💘🥵🥰🥲
🥺MY👨DAD🤓🤡💀🤮WALKS🚶IN🤯🤐😡🤬😵
💕💘SHREK😻💋LOOKS👀🤢💀HIM🤬😠🤓➡️STRAIGHT➡️IN THE👀EYE👁️AND🗣️SAYS.👄"🙂ITS👏ALL👏👹OGRE💚🫡NOW🫥😱"😂🤣😱😱😱
💚🥵💕SHREK😇😍🥰💔LEAVES👋👋THROUGH🤫MY🥺🥺☹️WINDOW🪟👋🥺😞❤️❤️
💚😍SHREK🥰💚IS💕LOVE❤️❤️💋,😭😱SHREK🥵🥰IS🟰🛟LIFE🐣👏👏👏💋

Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

by Bbb23’s left testicle October 29, 2024

Life Epiphany

When an event or person causes one to make a realization of themselves, or their life style. One that they had not recognized previously. Causing them to make changes in their self evaluation, lifestyle choices, way of rationalizing, and choice of personal actions.

After his younger sister gave him a gift of condoms for Christmas, Joseph had a life epiphany, and began acting differently in his social life.

by NixTay June 17, 2019

Jaws of Life

The process of spreading the anus out horizontally with both hands, fingers spread and wrist deep.

"She got trapped in the washing machine, so I gave her the Jaws of Life."

by salmon_eggs August 21, 2024

Music of life

The specific genre, vibe or developments of your music taste accompanied by important changes in your life. There are no lows, highs and overall just random arcs that can't be described through a playlist.

"I would describe my Music of life as the protagonist of a coming-of-age movie."

by musical literature August 18, 2021

Life-lapse

Occurs when an individual carries on with an activity they were doing recently in the past (a few minutes, several hours, the day before, etc.) in present time without realizing that they already completed the activity; the individual almost immediately recognizes that they are not doing what they originally had set in mind to do, but instead are repeating a previous activity and/or routine from before. The individual usually has to back track and/or reorient themselves in order to continue with their original task after realizing that they were momentarily living in the past instead of focusing and acting or reacting in the present. A natural phenomenon that can occur when an individual is neither paying attention to nor actively focusing on what exactly they are supposed to be doing and instead allow muscle memory to momentarily take over and carry out the task for them, despite realizing thereafter that the task was done incorrectly because the body was not performing the same task that the individual was trying to accomplish.

I was just trying to finish this math problem when suddenly I had a life-lapse and had to rework the problem because I forgot what I was doing.

by War&Ruin August 31, 2018

life

Nobody knows the meaning of life.

What’s the meaning of life?

I don’t know, dude.

by theperfectpseudonym November 27, 2018