Skip to main content

the alphabet of manliness

The funniest/manliness piece of literature mankind has ever read. Perhaps it will be looked back on as the manliest book of all time.

To quote the author, Maddox (creator of "The Best Page in the Universe... www.maddox.xmission.com), here's an exerpt and commentary from/about his book:

"This is the only sentence in the entire book that will give you a chance to adjust your face; take your time, because it’s about to be rocked off — permanently.

Finally, a book that guarantees your balls will be stomped; a book so manly that it will make even the burliest of men (and in some cases, the burliest of women) feel inadequate. So manly, it needs to be shaved: The Alphabet of Manliness. This collection of sacred writings may very well be the greatest compilation of all things manly throughout history. Here’s a small sample of the ass-kickery found within these revered pages of outright manliness:

* People getting drop-kicked in the face

* Phallic aggression

* Violence in excess of what has come to be known as excessive

* Garish disregard for the well-being of children

* Contempt for animals, women, and other cultures

* Intimidating rhetoric

* Obscure penile references

* The triumph of flannel over good taste"

- Maddox
Chapter "R" for Restroom Etiquette from The Alphabet of Manliness states:

"RULE 1: Don't Gawk At the Cock

If you look at a man's penis at a urinal, the packets of light known as photons are bouncing off his dick and are being directly absorbed into your eyes. You wouldn't drip visine into your eyes that has dripped off another man's balls would you??"
by LoganP June 26, 2006
mugGet the the alphabet of manliness mug.

Malin

The incarnation of awesome
See: Legendary

The most sincere and awesome person end of story. She is witty, savage af and cool yet still super humble. Most commonly described as a total badass whom never fail to make you laugh and feel good about yourself. Talking to her make you feel like wow am I dreaming or did I just meet a walking godess?
omg Malin I love you can I like braid your hair or something?
by apparentlyawesome September 6, 2016
mugGet the Malin mug.

malinquarious

dodgy, broken, not quite right
This is a malinquarious tripod. My pictures will look terrible.
by T.Bird April 24, 2007
mugGet the malinquarious mug.

majlinda

Albanian qur who makes people laugh every time they're not in the mood. She is a sweetheart, but honey, once you touch her nerves she'll kick the shit out of you. She can be a man and woman at the same time, she'll protect you like a man, but slays at the same time like no other girl does. She's awesome.
Damn, you look Majlinda today!
by ALB_ks January 3, 2017
mugGet the majlinda mug.

malinalli

small and fragile dont fuck with them because they will likely kick your ass any day of the week. Ussually has a big brother who would do anything for her including kill you.
Don't mess with malinalli
by Anklbreakr October 27, 2019
mugGet the malinalli mug.

hedda and malin

they are the coolest girls you could ever find!!

Are hot, sexy, nice, kind and exstremely smart!!!
You just have to love them!
Every guy fall in love with them!
"do you see those hot girls over there?"
"yeah! they look like Hedda and Malin !"

"Did you see the caracter on that test?"
"It is so Hedda and Malin!"
by The hotties December 7, 2011
mugGet the hedda and malin mug.

Mailis

Mailis is the typical best friend in Hollywood Movies; she’s gorgeous, smart, always has your back and has the best advice, even for the worst situation you’re stuck in. It’s simply the definition of the perfect best friends everyone dreams of.
She’s my best friend. She’s a real Mailis!
by local weirdo July 24, 2018
mugGet the Mailis mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email