Skip to main content

man if you don't get yo!?!?!?!?!? 

its when you keep doing cravy suuf!!!!!!!!!!!
man get yo jfnerwkgfmnjdkgvmsk
anti amogus: hey man what yo doin 😀
man: amogus sussy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
anti amogus: man if you don't get yo!?!?!?!?!? 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨
man: 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎

If you can’t handle me at my fruitcake, you don’t deserve me at my tiramisu

A play on “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”, with a little more specificity. Fruitcake is heavy and dense (stupid). Tiramisu is decadent, but light and perky (has it all).
He said I was being dramatic and irrational, so I told him, ‘if you can’t handle me at my fruitcake, you don’t deserve me at my tiramisu!’

national fuck your boyfriend even if you don’t want to day 

April 11 is national fuck your boyfriend even if you don’t want to day
Girlfriend: hey babe do you know what day it is?
Boyfriend: no what day is it ?
Girlfriend: it’s national fuck your boyfriend even if you don’t want to day

fucking mug you asshole I will put you to sleep permanently if you don't get the mug you bitch get the

Man 1: "woah u should get the fucking mug you asshole I will put you to sleep permanently if you don't get the mug you bitch get the mug"

now, if you two don't mind, i'm going to bed, before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed - or worse, expelled. 

"now, if you two don't mind, i'm going to bed, before either of you come up with another clever idea to get us killed - or worse, expelled." - hemione granger
"she needs to sort out her priorities." - ronald weasley

If first you don't succeed, try, try again 

When a bitch leaves you on seen, you keep on harassing her until she finally gives in.
Trey: "Man, Stacey left me on seen. What should I do?"

Tristan: "If first you don't succeed, try, try again."