Michigan Rapper 1: "Took tha lil hoe to the cut, the garage, then I bent tha bitch over an gave her a baller massage"
Michigan Rapper 2: *actively making bank 📃
Michigan Rapper 2: *actively making bank 📃
by TheHardtest June 7, 2022
Get the baller massage mug.Noun;
When you splash the tip of your Johnson with a dab of habañero hot sauce, and then proceed to poke your mate in the eyeball.
When you splash the tip of your Johnson with a dab of habañero hot sauce, and then proceed to poke your mate in the eyeball.
Let me tell you… Last night I went out to the local pub with the intent of playing billiards, and I received a Mexican eyeball massage from the softest local pirate. He had hair like a lady.
by Hunky bear junior June 17, 2022
Get the Mexican eyeball massage mug.Like the conventional hot rock massage ,a Type of massage involves the use and placement of heated basalt river rocks on different points of the body it is then used to deep tissue massage by qualified technicians to expertly massage with the use of the stones ,
The Bavarian version has substituted the Rocks for three ( or four ) equally spaced faecal nuggets along the spine of the lucky recipient of the deep tissue relaxation massage .
The Bavarian version has substituted the Rocks for three ( or four ) equally spaced faecal nuggets along the spine of the lucky recipient of the deep tissue relaxation massage .
by StuBoy February 15, 2022
Get the Bavarian hot rock massage mug.A speculative, avant-garde, or dystopian wellness practice where the masseur’s technique is centered on meticulously harvesting the client’s fingerprints during the session. Instead of kneading muscles, the practitioner uses high-fidelity scanning pads, fine clays, or pressure-sensitive films embedded in their fingertips to capture a perfect map of the client’s unique epidermal ridges. This is performed under the guise of “bio-mapping for personalized energy work” or “dermatoglyphic stress analysis,” but the true product is the biometric data. It’s the ultimate fusion of faux-spiritual self-care with covert identity theft, turning relaxation into a data harvest.
Example: “The new spa offered a ‘Fingerprinting Massage for Chakra Alignment.’ The therapist said she was ‘reading my energy pathways through my unique prints.’ An hour later, I was deeply relaxed, and my biometric login at work was mysteriously compromised. She didn’t just release my knots; she copied my keys.”
by Abzunammu February 2, 2026
Get the Fingerprinting Massage mug.A form of speaking used when trying to convince somebody of something obviously false in order to maintain a delusional truth.
Hanna tried telling us her Microsoft Word was standard for a macbook for hours, she was obviously massaging the language.
by llunstablell February 10, 2026
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