Access card

The State of Pennsylvania's form of a Welfare card. Naturally abused by most (not all, I'm sure a minority of those using it actually DO put it to the intended use), the Access card is a bitch for the rest of us. It always works out that some asshole on Welfare is right in front of you in the "8 Items or Less" checkout with potato chips, a case of motor oil, weave, ass loads of kool-aid, a box of rubbers (ironically), a Snickers bar, a case of toilet paper, and some milk. As if it wasn't bad enough that the ignorant bastard has more than 8 items, then they have to seperate the order into two orders...the Access order, and the <i>Pennsylvania Says 'Fuck You' Lazy Ass</i> order. So first comes the order paid in cash, which goes well. Then out comes the greenish-blue and yellow Access card! **stabs chest with car keys** So Captain 3-tooth swipes his card for the fourth time, and still a denial message. Why, you ask? Well Mr.DipShit didn't notice that he doesn't have shit on his card!!! It's over halfway through the month, what did he expect?

After holding up the checkout for 15 minutes, LaShaniqua gave up on the sixteenth swipe of her Access card and pulled out a Benjamin, got a receipt, and we all clapped.

by Josh the Expo October 20, 2006

s card

Making a girl squirt for the first time.

Paul: I took Sam's s card. She squirted all over Mike's bed.
Rob: Did it smell?
Paul: Yes

by robertoblanco June 29, 2011

Card Mechanic

A card cheat who specializes in sleight-of-hand manipulation of cards

1. Did you see that guy cheatng?
2. Yeah, he was a card mechanic!

by trkz December 6, 2003

Gay Card

A card held by either Gays or Lesbians. It is simply used to show pride and to show men (hitting on a lesbian) and women (hitting on a gay) that are in fact Gay/Lesbian and thereby, not interested.

Male: "Hey, are you from Tennessee because you're the only ten I see"
Lesbian: "Let me just show you my gay card because I'm not interested"

by Elfoise April 19, 2019

marked cards

It is a cheating deck of poker cards, with invisible inks on it's back or cut-out on it's corner, often need special cameras or lens to detect them. The purpose is to know exactly what cards are being dealt to gain more winning probability.

Tom was caught in casino for cheating with marked cards.

by eyemarkedcards November 5, 2014

drunk card

being justified the next morning after doing something stupid while under the influence of alcohol.

Mike: Did you smash Vinny last night?

Angelina: i would never touch him but since i was drunk unfortunately he got it in

Mo: that bitch need to stop playing the drunk card

by moe1888 October 20, 2010

Kid Card

Using son or daughter as an excuse to either go to or miss a certain event e.g. work.

Whassup homes...you already at home from work?
Yeah, had to pick up my son.
Ah gotcha - played your "Kid Card" again, eh? You slacker!

by ab5sr September 27, 2009