COVID Kevin

A modern Typhoid Mary, Covid Kevin is an asymptomatic disease carrier of the COVID 19 virus. With his self-righteous, ill-informed understanding of what contagious and constitutional means, his protestations to the checkout girl, free from the tyranny and oppression of a removable face covering, can infect the people around him with his freedom laden spittle and spew.

During COVID Kevin’s viral mating season of 3 to 14 or more days, Kevin can infect dozens of others, statistically sending several to the hospital or their death, fulfilling his role in the pandemic ecosystem.

SYNONYMS:

COVID Cory, COVID Cody, COVID Carl, as well as other catchy names that pair well with Covid, including its feminized versions, COVID Carole and COVID Karen (Not to be confused with the white privileged, self-righteous female “Karen”)
1. Is that some COVID Kevin making an ass out of himself in the checkout line?

2. Whenever I’m indoors with people I don’t know not wearing masks, I can’t help but feel I’m surrounded by a bunch of COVID Kevins.

3. Poor guy, he was a COVID Kevin and didn’t even know it.
by Mad Mod Lib July 12, 2020
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COVID-Munging

This is a variant of munging in which the corpse to be munged is a victim of the coronavirus, who is acquired via a local nursing home. To ensure proper social distancing, the participating individual who loses the coin toss, rock-paper-scissors, or other contest of choice, pops an experimental dick-enlarging pill which extends the participant’s penile length to 6 feet, in addition to donning a face mask with a slit cut out in the middle in order to allow the expelled mung and corona juice mixture (hence “COVID-mung”) to enter the perpetrator’s orifice(s) in an internationally acceptable manner.
Zack: Hey Cody, you wanna head over to the old folk’s home?

Cody: Yea sure... Why? You volunteering or something?

Zack: No, I just have a real strong hankering to perform a COVID-Munging on one of the former residents. Since I haven’t been able to get any quarantine pussy, I figured this’d be the next best thing to give my dick a nice kickstart.
Cody: You’re sick. What the fuck is wrong with you?
(Cody leaves the room only to quickly return, walking past Zack with the car keys)
Cody: C’mon you sick bastard, let’s go. Some old woman named Ethyl that I used to help just died and the way she put her muffins in the oven always made me sweat a bit.
by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 July 06, 2020
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COVID machismo

The mistaken belief that a sub-microscopic piece of RNA code can be bluffed by representing that you hold a large penis.
Mason openly displayed his AR-15 and hugged his MAGA brothers and sisters in an open display of COVID machismo. Nineteen days later, his mother went to the hospital.
by WildTurkeyNYC May 13, 2020
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Covid Hostage

When a country’s “zero Covid” policy leads to more restrictions and bans on both locals and aliens, often creating irrational fear and panic buying among them due to a shortage of fresh produce in wet markets and of basic essentials in supermarkets, including the closure of religious sites and hair salons nationwide.
How long more would Communist China hold the people in Hong Kong under Covid hostage?
by MathPlus February 09, 2022
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Covid Craze

When someone has had enough of Coronavirus and wants to get out of quarantine asap. They usually go in a Covid Craze when they are bored or haven’t gone outside for ages.
“Did you see Jennifer’s Whatsapp status?! I think she’s having a Covid Craze
by ughhlivv April 11, 2020
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That's got COVID

When something tastes, smells or is just overall bad
Person 1: Ew, look at that!
Person 2: That's got COVID
by Twinseers March 24, 2021
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Covid Dump

A dump so devastating it has the potential to end humanity.

The type of dump that could ground a plane, close a business, or could be proclaimed as a public health emergency.
Tim: Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. The smell made my eyes water and I think my throat started to close up!

Pat: Yeah man. I took a Covid Dump in there a couple hours ago.
by Ahsential37 April 23, 2020
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