Bed Napkin

The top sheet of the bed. Can be used to wipe bodily fluids off of face after dining.

Honey, where’s the bed napkin so I can wipe the saliva/semen/pussyjuice/santorum off my chin. I’m a big mess! The last time I saw it, it was twisted around my ankles.

by Sad giraffe May 25, 2019

bed condom

a large sheet of plastic used to cover someone's dirty bed before you sleep in it while they're not home.

he sleeps around so much that i had to put a bed condom on his bed before i crashed in it.

by the real frank the tank April 22, 2009

Cheese in bed

Just cheese in bed really? Little Laurenz songs and that. Based off Send my love to your new lover. Who has cheese in bed.
Made in 2015/2016 by accident.

Only real intellectuals know

LL: You know that song?

AA: I know....
BOTH: CHEESE IN BEDDD

by The Wandering Arab February 12, 2022

stabbing the bed

When a guy sleeps on his stomach and has a boner, causing said boner to stick into the mattress.

I woke up this morning with my penis hurting, I must have been stabbing the bed all night!

by Jim Throttle September 30, 2017

Bed Bird

A person who has their make-up done well but is otherwise in bed. Typically have messy hair and PJs on.

"I did my make-up but then just laid in bed all day. What a waste."
"You're such a bed bird."

by Thatpersonyoualllove October 18, 2016

Go to bed

Go to bed - meaning just be quiet and pretend you’re sleeping to resemble no noise and peacefulness.

“You’re so pathetic , just go to bed.”

by uncircumsised lemon November 18, 2019

bed mayo

Another word for cum.

Oh no! You got bed mayo all over my hair!

by tablesauce December 31, 2016