when a guy fronts like he's a straight douche but he's carrying Gucci luggage, wearing sunglasses indoors, wearing bright fucking colors/a scarf and swinging his hips (vigorously).
by shabbyjohnson August 24, 2011
a directioner that refuses to tell anyone that they like One Direction; they know all of their songs, own a bunch of merchandise, and secretly dance around in their room to WMYB; usually happens with boys that are in denial about liking pop music. in fact, they are so in denial that they are drowning
OMG, Stacy, Darren is such a Closet Directioner! I saw him dancing in his room to What Makes You Beautiful, and i took pictures and videos!
by Kaeree36 April 29, 2015
Someone who seems like a decent person in public but, when given the opportunity, says/does despicable things.
Jenny: Wow, Craig seemed so nice... then I looked him up on Facebook and saw all his mysoginist rude posts. What a closet asshole!
by allejoisthebest March 17, 2016
Closet Ostrich- an ostrich who lives in closets and wants money from you... even though you already paid the ostrich last Thursday. This term was coined by the band Fat Hands, and is from their song "Ostrich in My Closet".
"What happened to all the money you made last week?"
"I had to pay my Closet Ostrich again. He won't leave."
"I had to pay my Closet Ostrich again. He won't leave."
by treesofgreen October 25, 2017
One who designs without consequences or comment. Including but not limited to election or selection of network monkeys.
by network junkies April 15, 2009
by ItsBeanin December 29, 2022
Jim was out and proud, but he didn't have a real boyfriend. He would just have sex in the bathroom with some closet candy he met at the school.
Tom wasn't out yet, but he did manage to garner some sexual experience by being Jim's closet candy.
Tom wasn't out yet, but he did manage to garner some sexual experience by being Jim's closet candy.
by chickenbiscuit3000 July 06, 2010