wanker's cramp

A condition commonly occuring in those diagnosed with RSI, (although not necessarily), in which the sufferer experiences pain or discomfort after excessive wanking.

Sean: wank me off, bitch.
Lucy: i can't, i've got wanker's cramp.

by 400 May 30, 2008

Superdry Wanker

Someone that seems to only wear Superdry clothing.

'That guys dressed all in Superdry!'
'What a Superdry Wanker!'

by Tiktackz December 31, 2011

wanker's whiplash

A painful spasm felt after nearly being caught wanking, the actual pain is felt when one pulls their hand back from their cock and their shoulder is strained by the sudden movement. A good way of preventing this from happening is to stretch before masterbating or simply locking your door.

Person A - Hey, why's your arm in a sling?

Person B - Last night i thought i was alone in the house, so i had a wank. Midway through i heard my mum come up the stairs so i paniced and... (points at arm) this happened.

Person A - Whoa... Wanker's Whiplash... You should have limbered up first.

by Anonymous #924876 January 19, 2010

Plank-Wanker

n: A derogatory term used to describe someone who partakes in the noble sport of Extreme Lying Down, but refers to it as Planking.

Person 1: Hey man, you wanna come planking with me?

Person 2: Boy, you are lucky I don't smack you upside the head! You bloody Plank-Wanker!

by Funky W June 9, 2011

Sissy wanker

Person who masturbates because they are depressed.

That faggot is such a sissy wanker, there were more tears than cum.

by Awesome19922 April 20, 2011

Wankers Tash

also known as crab ladder, the hair below the naval leading down to the pubic region.

Fucking Hell! Your Wankers Tash is like a monkeys arm

by Escalations Moose December 14, 2008

Fat Wanker

1. An insult.

2. A description of someone who is both fat *and* and a wanker.

3. A very annoying fat boss.

My boss is a big fat wanker

by Blubber Hater December 1, 2003