Platypus Controlling Me

The rap song that is performed by amateur lyricist and pharmacist Doctor Heinz doofenshmirtz. The song is a very modern take on societal issues, mostly including overarching authority figures.

Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Well I'll be honest I don't really understand
But I fell down this hill now I got glue on my hands
And I got records on my fingers
Kids: What
Doof: Records on my fingers
I got records on my fingers and I just can't stop
Kids: Don't stop
Doof: I can't stop I got a platypus controlling me
Kids: WHAT
Doof: I got a platypus controlling me
Now let me sum it up
It was a strange set of circumstances
Kids: Strange set of circumstances
Doof: I fell down the hill, I got glue on my hands now I got records on my fingers
And I just can't stop
Kids: DON'T STOP DON'T STOP
Doof: Well I would if I was able
There's a platypus controlling me he's underneath the table
Kids: There's a platypus controlling him
WHAT
Kid: Oh I get it, platypus is a metaphor for whatever is keeping you down
Kid: Like corporations are a platypus
Kids: The government's a platypus
Your teacher is a platypus
Weird Kid: My teacher is a panda
Kids: Society's a platypus
My parents are a platypus
The media's a platypus
It's all just propaganda
We've all got platypus controlling us
Heinz Doofenshmirtz: No just me
Kids: We've all got platypus controlling us
Doof: I'd stop if I was able
Kids: We've all got platypus controlling us
Doof: I'm not speaking metaphorically
The platypus controlling me is underneath the table
Oh wait, no, he's gone
Hey
There's no platypus controlling me
There's no platypus controlling me

by HoloVenom May 1, 2020

lock me up

When you've been caught red handed by someone and it's usually embarrassing.

Paul: Gary got with that whale the other day
Fred: Did you Gary?
Gary: Yeah, guilty as charged, lock me up. *Puts hands in a handcuff like position*

by Harcus Modgkinson November 13, 2013

take me to the edge

when one person masturbates another person right to the point of ejaculation.

take me to the edge, then throws them off makes them cum.

by bind torture kill June 29, 2016

Caff me up

1. What one says when in question from someone who offers to get a drink for them, to imply that the one in question does not care what drink the one who is offering gets, as long as the drink contains Caffeine.

Joe- "Hey Liz, I am going to go into 7-11 to get a drink, want anything?"

Liz- "I'm tired and need to finish these exams, Caff me up"

Joe- "Hey, I got you some Sprite"

Liz- "You Dick"

by Eraserkid November 15, 2009

Took me to church

When someone shows you a "good time" in bed. Reference the expression "made her see god."

Example: "How was your date with Kelly?"

" It was awesome man, I took her to church!"

Jessica: My date with Matt was amazing, he totally took me to church.
Luci: So you saw god?

by Jessica In Japan March 9, 2015

meet me in the hallway

one of the best album openers by one of the best artistes out there mr harry edward styles whoever says meet me in the hallway is not a good song is lying

person 1: hey! have u heard of harry styles?
person 2: yeah! his song meet me in the hallway is incredible

by sunflowersundermybed September 16, 2020

cash me ousside

a meme that got viral from Danielle Bregoli, from the Dr. Phil show.

"cash me ousside how bow dah"
"catch you outside? What does that mean"
"What I just said!"

by omfggdiana February 18, 2017