tactical excuse

An excuse or set of excuses that removes or points the blame of poor performance or poor planning on ones equipment, other operators, or acts of god such as weather.

Operator 1: Hey what seems to be the issue, you were just laughing at how easy this was going to be a few days ago?
Operator 2: The sun is in my eyes, and its so cold I can't complete simple tasks, but mostly I'm hungry and when that happens I get dizzy. Any other time non of this would not be an issue.
Operator 1: Damn, your full of tactical excuses... go change your manpon.

by trevp April 15, 2015

Tactical Lodestar

The act of shooting loads on your girlfriends face in the dark whilst watching from birds eye view, wearing night vision goggles.

Yes bro, I used the Tactical Lodestar on her, just like black ops II

by OG Mudpipe September 8, 2018

tactical insertion

Wiggling yourself inbetween the couch cousion and the person lying down so you can push them off

His fat ass was lying down on the couch so used a tactical insertion to knock him off

by A guy who wants more words April 26, 2011

Tactical Shit

The shit that you have to ensure relief after eating too much. Sometimes referred to as a TS or TP (Tactical Poo), the tactical shit is often taken after a night out or a boozy lunch.

Stu: "Mate you were in there for ages, are you OK?"

James: "Yeah man, I was just having a tactical shit after too much meat, I feel on top of the world now!"

by MissS8 August 8, 2014

tactical spoon

The spoon that comes in an MRE. Used for assisting a healthy dump in the field.

Wow, I just took a shit and I wouldn't have made it were it not for the 'tactical spoon' I brought with me.

by ninja694evar March 5, 2007

tactical insertion

Getting laid by using a specific methodology for picking up chicks.

I performed a tactical insertion on Lissete's mom at Sandy's.

by ChekYur6 February 9, 2010

Tactical chunder

The process of forcibly making yourself sick in order to stop feeling ill, enabling you to continue as you were. Usually used during a night out involving copious amounts of alcohol but CAN be used when feeling too full from eating. Tactical chundering can be achieved by using implements such as ones own fingers or anything of a similar appearance.

I went out into the smoking area and decided to have a tactical chunder but after I was done, the security guard dragged me out and put me at the bus stop outside the club where I proceeded to chunder into my pocket. But the second lot of sick wasn't tactical.

OR

I felt so stuffed from the crumpets and huge roll I had that I considered tactical chunder but I was incorrectly informed that it would in fact be bulimia.

by Florank May 29, 2010