I ate at a restaurant the other night, the waiter pulled me aside and douche-spanked me for leaving a $1 tip
by tjdabomb August 29, 2011
Get the douche-spanked mug.A douche bag is a man who has a very high, undeserved, self esteem and confidence. Typically, douche bags also have a high opinion of their personal apperance, whether it is deserved, or not. (Inspired by Family Guy).
1. A dumb woman says "I hope I can smooch a cute Douche Bag in this night club tonight". (Source: Occupation Double, reality tv show.)
2. A douche bag will never understand that he is a douche bag. Or he will interpret as a compliment.
2. A douche bag will never understand that he is a douche bag. Or he will interpret as a compliment.
by Bob Gratton 69 December 1, 2022
Get the Douche bag mug.dou·ché
do͞oˈSHā/
exclamation: douché
(in fencing) used as an acknowledgment of a hit to one's opponent, who happens to be a douche.
used as an acknowledgment during a discussion of a good or clever point made at one's expense (who happens to be a douche) by another person.
do͞oˈSHā/
exclamation: douché
(in fencing) used as an acknowledgment of a hit to one's opponent, who happens to be a douche.
used as an acknowledgment during a discussion of a good or clever point made at one's expense (who happens to be a douche) by another person.
Walking to my car after work this evening. A group of 4 young dudes walks up to the crosswalk the same time I do. As we wait I hear them chatting among themselves. One turns to me and says "nice hair. Did ur mom fuck a smurf?". To which his buddies laugh. Without missing a beat I look at him, smile, and say "nice face. Did ur mom fuck a horse?" His buddies literally double over howling with laughter. "Douche'!!"
by ForgingGraphemes September 9, 2016
Get the Douche' mug.A terrific example of a human being that can be cool yet also a complete douche. Basically, a best friend type person that happens to make choices in his/her life that make you wish you could hit them with a frying pan. A tremendous combination of awesome factors and qualities of the douchiest. Most likely in his/her 30's or 40's, and having lived an eventful life. Also, most likely to be a manager of a Cracker Barrel or some other embarrassing position.
Look at that guy, he is so funny and awesome, but he makes horrible choices and blows off his best friend to go to bed at 8 at night.
Wow, you just described a Douche-Nard!!!
Wow, you just described a Douche-Nard!!!
by Sparklz So Good February 21, 2013
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by KayChas January 22, 2019
Get the Douche Child mug.The idea that every election is between a giant douche and a turd sandwich. Especially applicable to the United States.
'i believe in the Douche and Turd philosophy"
"What is that?"
"I'm voting between a giant douche and a turd sandwich!"
"That's how it always is!"
"What is that?"
"I'm voting between a giant douche and a turd sandwich!"
"That's how it always is!"
by EG FRESH November 13, 2021
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