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The Hemopheliac Lobster

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(Hemophelia being the disease where you bleed alot.) Bang your girl as hard as you can on all fours until she bleeds out of where ever your penis is inserted. Then proceed to the next hole and the next and so forth.
The Hemopheliac Lobster
by The Big Fig September 19, 2009
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The old lobster claw

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When your shrimp doesn’t cut it, so you give her the old lobster claw 4 in the puss one in the ass.
Yeah man my new girl hates shrimp.

Well good thing you can still give her the old lobster claw
by StonedAF October 13, 2023
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The Red Lobster Dream

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The Red Lobster Dream is an extremely significant sign that the Red Lobster has visited you at night. You and the other person in the Red Lobster Dream have been caught in the claws of the Red Lobster's curse.
"I had a dream we were at Red Lobster together"
"Fuck that's the Red Lobster Dream"
by GrunglePuss January 11, 2024
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Larry The Not Lobster

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Larry The Not Lobster is a stuffed Scorpion that was mistaken to be a Lobster. He's always grumpy and doesn't like new people, he shows this by making a mooing sound and attacks them with his claws.

He likes Bluey the Whale who is his best friend and love watching wrestling together.

Larry loves getting more attention than everyone else because he's special.

He has his own song that goes LAAARRYYY THE NOT LOBSTER which gets repeated a number of times and then he does a cute little dance.

But at the end of the day he loves nothing more than climbing into his egg sock and getting snug at the end of the day and going to leep.
larry The Not Lobster
by Lord Mountevans August 26, 2017
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Derived from an ancient story of French decent. The French bastards were searching for the lost city of Heracleum. Egypt was desperately trying to locate their city of gold which had become submerged under water some 2300 years ago (rough estimate). Egypt was well on their way to locating the city when they discovered the technique of tying pyramid rocks to their asses to pull them down significantly faster. French also had a good technique, they would take live lobsters and shove them up their ass so the tail would stick out and flap around acting as a propeller. There is no clear evidence as to who discovered this city, if it was discovered at all. Some say it was discovered but kept hidden. It is fairly evident that the Egyptians technique did not work considering 45 of the 46 test dummies never surfaced again. The only person to surface only did so because when he got to the bottom he allegedly shoved a lobster up his ass to propel him to the top. When he surfaced he had one quote before he died of unknown causes. He said "What the fuck were we thinking?!" in some strange tongue (some believe this tongue to be Egyptian, due to the fact that Egyptian was his nationality).
A great dispute started over who created the "'Tail' of the Lobster-Ass" due to the death of the Egyptian. This caused a great battle involving the Egyptions taking two lobsters to the sleeping French shoving one WAAYYYYY up his asshole and clamping one to the frenulum of his penis. Some believe this is the beginning of era where the French become large salty assholes, due to the large lobster, fresh out of the the salt water, being shoved up their ass. No correlation was made the lobster clamping onto their penal skin.

Now-a-days this is a common prank done among teenagers but the teenagers need to be really really fucking hammered to the point where the victim wont remember how he got the lobster in his ass. He wakes up questioning himself. This prank is extra funny because it often convinces the teenager that he is gay with a lobster fetish.

Never used in everyday dialog except to say, "What fucking moron wrote the definition of The 'Tail' Of Lobster-Ass?"
by Doug Funny and PorkChop February 19, 2010
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Lobstering in the Keys

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The act of performing cunnilingus or fellatio on a person with an active outbreak of pubic lice.
My face is itchy as fuck after I spent all night lobstering in the Keys with that girl from the bar.
by Koch$ July 20, 2019
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