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swanson pyramid of greatness

if your not living your life by it, your living wrong.

the ron swanson pyramid of greatness is a pyramid chart of the most badass TV character ever introduced to the fucking planet. it slowly teaches you how to be destined to become a badass white guy stuck as director of park and recreations at a small town in indiana who hates government but works in it as well. a dedicated fellow, this chart will make you a ron swanson.

"If you have any complaints, questions, or concerns, deal with it yourself, like an adult."
-Ron Swanson
"the swanson pyramid of greatness taught me how to be the perfect american and not some uncultured swine like the fucker reading this"
by mr swanson July 31, 2018
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Swanson Dinner

2. Swanson Dinner

What one would encounter while performing oral sex on a girl if her previous partner had vomited in the act.
Carl: Damn, Josh, I wouldn't have gone down on her if I had known I was going to find a Swanson dinner!
Josh: Sorry, dude. It must have been the sushi.
by Dleg December 21, 2008
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Swanson Dinner

Completing a variety of sexual activities with a girl (including penetration, oral sex, anal, sleighride, etc.) in ONE night.
Josh: So what did you and Jenna do last night?
James: Oh I gave her a Swanson Dinner ;)
by Franzzz November 6, 2008
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Swanson's disease

A disease similar to Parkinson's disease
Swanson's disease has 5 stages, each stage getting progressively worse until you reach stage 5, where you lose the ability to make wise financial decisions
Stage 1 symptoms: Mild shaking in both hands. Engineering Textbooks become especially hard to read.
Stage 2 symptoms: A higher degree of shaking in all limbs. Loss of general motor control
Stage 3 symptoms: Similar to Parkinson's disease, loss of motor function

Stage 4 symptoms: Engineering prowess exceeds all others, reverts to stage 1 symptom

Stage 5 symptoms: The victim has the urge to form a lacklustre engineering company. Designs wall sockets with structural beams running through the centre
Fred: 'Did you hear about Han's diagnosis of Stage 5 Swanson's disease?'
Mogus: 'oh dear'
by Wade&co Representative June 26, 2022
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Swanson's Doomp

A fat dip of smokeless tobacco, any dip >1/3 of the can of deezy.
Yo dawg, I lost my can. Can I bum a Swanson's doomp?
by Vladomir69 November 6, 2012
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Swanson Appetite

A tall lanky white guy who loves to eat pussy. Swanson
Pussy is his appetite and that is all he craves and will not stop until he's had enough which is most likely never.
Look, he's got a swanson appetite!
by Billl Cosby April 12, 2008
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Swanson Johnson

A phrase that descibes a mystery...such as a name,place,time ect.
"Who's comming with us?" "Swanson Johnson."
by Swanson Johnson January 14, 2005
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