Skip to main content

Wilford's Razor

Commonly worded as:

"The plausibility of any conspiracy theory is inversely proportional to the level of government hyper‑competence needed to maintain it"

Other wording:
"The plausibility of any conspiracy theory decreases as the level of government hyper-competence required to sustain it increases."

"The plausibility of any conspiracy theory is inversely proportional to the level of government hyper‑competence required to maintain it."

"The plausibility of any conspiracy theory is inversely proportional to the amount of government hyper‑competence it would require to plan, execute, and keep it secret."

In other words:
If a plot needs dozens of agencies to be flawless, leak‑proof, and perfectly coordinated for years… it probably didn’t happen.
Neighbor: “The mayor unleashed a raccoon crisis to distract from the budget meeting.”
You: “I'm invoking Wilford's Razor: City Hall can’t herd three councilmembers—let alone a raccoon militia.”
by Koffea August 12, 2025
mugGet the Wilford's Razor mug.

Wet Wilford Brimley

It's when you're taking a girl from behind, you're about to finish, and you pull out. But instead of finishing, you pour piping hot Quaker Oats on her back and warn her about diabetes.
Oh man, I was having a late breakfast of some oatmeal when my girl woke up DTF. It was hard to stop but I couldn't resist giving her the old Wet Wilford Brimley.
by Steele, Jim November 24, 2023
mugGet the Wet Wilford Brimley mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email