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chimputer

A hybrid of chimp and computer, a chimputer is a machine that behaves badly, especially one that had previously operated well, until some attack or catastrophic error that requires the attention of an administrator or a security investigator. Possibly a result of mishearing or misunderstanding, the variant "chumputer" is also occasionally encountered.
Man, I had a gigaquad box this morning, but after that power surge, it's just a chimputer.

CodeSculptor, you've got a chimputer after that breach -- you need a good Security Monkey.

Sit back, I'll drive, I know how to swing a chimputer.
by Ernie Cordell April 20, 2007
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chimpanzee ass

the act of eating spicy primarily Italian foods such as buffalo wings, lots of chicken parm or anything with pepperoni then taking a shit and upon exit the tasty medditeranian spices flood your asshole causing a sharp burning sensation which causes the victim to walk around with spread legs and a slightly gaped butthole to avoid painful friction
Louie: hey Mr. Formaggioni i just ate a 16 inch cold cut grinder with exra pepperoni from milano's do you think ill get chimpanzee ass

Mr. Formaggioni: ooo lou you shouldn't have done that your ass is gonna be burning like a rich lazy jew
by loudog413 December 2, 2010
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put on the rocky road chimpanzee suit

Chimpanzees are notorious for throwing their feces and ejaculate around. Putting on the rocky road chimpanzee suit is when a person is covered with every single bodily fluid available.
That blind date was such a psycho. All he wanted to do was put on the rocky road chimpanzee suit. There was piss and blood everywhere!
by Patick O'Neil January 22, 2006
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chimpanzee

An ugly-ass mother fucker. Someone whose face is extremely janked and actually looks like a monkey.
"Fix your mother fuckin' face nigga, look at these fuckin' chimpanzees, bunch of fuckin monkies"-Curtis 50 cent Jackson (Do It Myself-Young Buck)

"Dude look at this guy in the Spanish book!"
"Man that is one ugly-ass dude, he looks like a fucking chimpanzee"

Note: In the Holt Spanish Ven Conmigo #3 spanish book there is actually a guy who looks like a chimpanzee in chapter 2.
by Sergio Carvidas October 12, 2006
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hairless chimpanzee

The cops popped another hairless chimpanzee last night.

That hairless chimpanzee was so high on crack he was throwing his own at the cops.
by kaadoo September 25, 2017
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Chimpanzee Smile

The most radiant expression of joy any primate can exhibit.
The lights dimmed, brad postured himself on one knee and presented a tiny crush velvet box to Stacey. The one time whore was so overcome with emotion that her lips parted from ear to ear presenting one of the most gorgeous chimpanzee smiles in God's creation.
by m o g w a i June 27, 2007
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The Chimpanzee

A way of jacking off.
It is performed while hanging upside down from a tree.
The goal is to not accidentally nut in your face.
Joe: I blew a load into my mouth while I was doing the chimpanzee yesterday
Chad: My brudda that's insane
by mypeenfat August 16, 2020
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