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douche

loser who claims fame but has never had it, claims tours of America that were in fact holidays paid for by wife and family, and tries to tell folks about said holidays at a child's funeral.
"Trying to tell me about your holiday at this kid's funeral? Man, are YOU a douche!"
by Hamadryad July 29, 2012
mugGet the douchemug.

Douche nozzle

One with an excessive quality of douchiness. Someone who does moronic actions for the sole intent of douchifying everybody's day.
That douche nozzle just cut me off in traffic! I'm gonna ram my car so far up his ass he won't be able to shit for a week!
by Everyone's Favorite Nerd March 24, 2016
mugGet the Douche nozzlemug.

Douche bag drive by

When the laziest most worthless person in the office walks with purpose and sighing around the office so everyone know they are there.
Did you see John do the douche bag drive by around the perimeter .
by pettyblue72 September 12, 2022
mugGet the Douche bag drive bymug.

Douche Canoe

Someone so full of themselves, that they feel their physical appearance entitles them to to be admired. At which point, they then utilize this false sense of admiration to attempt to take advantage of infatuated victims.
That douche canoe thinks that just because he tries to impersonate Kurt Cobain, it automatically makes him a talented idol, when in reality he is an unskilled parasite.
by Seattle010518 January 7, 2018
mugGet the Douche Canoemug.

Douche cactus

A douche bag that causes immense pain.
Don't be such a douche cactus.
by Chute1885 April 10, 2019
mugGet the Douche cactusmug.

Douche Bag

Occasionally a turd who's not the nicest. They're looking for weak people or socially awkward people to be a fricking wad to.

Just ignore them and they'll probably go away. Or you can turn the tables and be a douche back. Just don't mess up or else he'll call over buddies and decide to scuffle with you.
"You're a douche bag!"
by CyanideOverload November 11, 2019
mugGet the Douche Bagmug.

Douche cream

The gunk that comes out after a girl douches
I ate that douche cream with a spoon after she douched last night
by Jeffythefry June 20, 2016
mugGet the Douche creammug.

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