two speed

Used to describe people who are incapable, whether through disinterest or the inability to stop, of drinking socially: they either have a single drink, or they get completely shitfaced.

Person 1: Gents, who's up for a few brewskis after work tonight?
Person 2: Great idea, I could really use a couple of bevvies. Should I invite Dave?
Person 1: Nah, it's a Thursday night so you know he'll flake - we'll invite him tomorrow to get absolutely rinsed though!
Person 2: Classic two speed Dave.

by alex101111 July 22, 2017

speed ghoster

1. An online persona, typically found on social media websites, who contacts another person, engages in conversation and through it, quickly grows rapport and trust then when the engagee is ready to meet in the real world, deletes all messages, their profile and subsequently disappears.

2. Similar to "Ghosting" but restricted to online-only pre-dating rituals akin to speed dating, but virtual.

3. A short story of the same name written by Joseph R. Sharpe describing the phenomena

The speed ghoster deleted her profile and all messages, never to be seen on Tinder again.

by Incultus August 24, 2017

speed racing

smoking large amounts marijuana

i feel like speed racing

by flaming potatoes November 24, 2016

corporate speed

Term used to label the slower than desireable decision making process, or most any process for that matter, that is present in many companies and corporations.

This process is moving at corporate speed

by Thriving July 29, 2013

Speed Seeing

Ultra efficiently viewing, seeing, experiencing and enjoying sights.

During a day in Yosemite the Speed Seeing Couple was able to experience 3 days worth of sights by not lollygagging. Blasting past each tourist filled stop.

by marble_player December 4, 2010

Speed Poo

When you only have a couple of minutes spare, but really need to drop a fat log, you must perform what is commonly know as a speed poo. You squeeze the poo out so hard that it leaves your body at the speed of light and you wipe your arse so quick that you get friction burn.

Fred: I’m just gonna go do a poo
Stan: But the show starts in a few minutes
Fred: Yeah I know, I’m gonna do a speed poo

by BentheGod October 7, 2020

Speed Mooching

The act of following another car traveling at a high rate of speed as to (hopefully) use them to distract any police.

I woulda been late to work if I wasn't speed mooching off that tuner Honda.

by Sqlivnlow April 15, 2019