jesus

jesus christ is my nigga

white priest rapping: jesus christ is my nigga

by Yosuf Seidlllll March 20, 2021

jesus

1) the christian's savoir
2) a mexican working at mcdonalds
3) a zombie

1) (said in a black woman voice) "praise ya jesus!"
2) (said in a mexican voice) "would you like some fries with that?"
3) ughhhhhhhhhh!

by sillygooseberry. June 21, 2009

Jesus

Adj.

Describing an object or action with greatness, or better than other things of that nature.

1. Hey Aaron, this hamburger is like jesus-in-a-box

2. Hey Paul, can I come over and play on your jesus computer?

by DJ Perxion December 18, 2007

jesus

a magician that lived 2000 years ago,fooling the less intelligent and weak.He was the chris angel of his time,the only reason why we dont think chris angel is the son of god is because we understand magic and know its fake but 2000 years ago people werent so smart.

Damm jesus you turned my water into wine,how did you do that ?

by nothing_but_the_truth December 24, 2008

jesus

A man who, according to a somewhat-popular book known as the Bible, was the son of God. Jews and atheists do not acknowledge his existence, but then, neither reads a Bible.

Anyway, it is said that Jesus died for us, the worthless humans we are, and rose three days later to prove his holiness. Some nonbelievers claim he hung out in his little cave eating beef jerkey he hid up his ass. But you don't need to believe either.

There was only one man who expected from us such a perfect balance that we could live by the law and still forgive the deviation. So, of course, we killed him.

-Orson Scott Card on "Jesus"

by Inyro October 31, 2007

Jesus

Was murdered/nailed to a cross because he opposed the Roman's pagan theocracy!

The Roman pagan theocracy legalized child molestation.

by satan is gay March 03, 2005

jesus

a magician that lived 2000 years ago,fooling the less intelligent and weak.He was the chris angel of his time,the only reason why we dont think chris angel is the son of god is because we understand magic and know its fake but 2000 years ago people werent so smart.

Damm jesus you turned my water into wine,how did you do that ?

by nothing_but_the_truth December 24, 2008