Making Jesus cry

To masturbate
Comes from Christian parents telling their kids “Every time you masturbate, Jesus cries”
Jesus is interchangeable with Hod in this context

An example of “making Jesus cry”
Friend 1:Did you get laid last night?
Friend 2: No, I was so horny I had to make Jesus cry
Friend 1: Gross, tmi

by Comic Sanders May 31, 2019

Jesus mode

Basically the opposite of sicko mode. Can be used when going to a place that you have to act socially acceptable, such as church or a funeral, or if you need to do good in a presentation or test for school.

"I'm about to go Jesus mode on the test."

by 241Bundalo March 21, 2019

Black Jesus

A god

Black Jesus was found running from the police.

by The Real Black Jesus March 24, 2019

Nick Jesus

A douchbag who is always depressed

That dude is Nick Jesus! He’s such a docuhebag!

by Dhehhdhd March 31, 2019

jesus stick

a vape

Hey Bobbie, can I see your Jesus stick for a sec?

by cattle graze April 6, 2019

Jesus Christ Lizard

Also known as a Chinese Water Dragon, a lizard that’s well-known for its ability to run on water.

Holy sh*t! Did you see that Jesus Christ Lizard running on water?!

by GsxrBarbie May 29, 2018

Radio Jesus

The greatest, best looking, squish chasing, beer chugging, tobacco chewing son of a trucker in the by God county.

If you don't like this guy then you have poor taste in people and flat out suck at life in the biggest kind of way.

"Bruh, nobody is cooler than Rick Flair."
"Radio Jesus son."
"Damn bruh. Got me there."

by WayzataRules June 1, 2018