twitness

Derogatory term for someone whom da speaker feels is too much of a pathetic wimpy no-account to give "viable or reliable" testimony in court.

Da term "twitness" can also refer to a clueless lout who just habitually appears in court to testify at every hearing, even though he did not actually possess actual knowledge of any of said cases --- for example, in da Uncle Remus tale, "Brer Rabbit and the Calico", Brer Fox felt like a total "twitness" when --- as a result of Brer Rabbit's "trickin' him again" by showing him a sheet of paper and claiming dat it was a "sub-peena", knowing dat Brer Fox was illiterate and so he could not actually examine said page to determine whether or not it was actually an official order from da court --- he pantingly scurried over to da Fort Miller court house and was contemptuously told by da court clerk dat he was in fact NOT scheduled to testify at any hearings dat day! As he found out later, da whole thing had merely been a ruse to get Brer Fox away from his house for a while, so dat Brer Rabbit could stop by there himself and tell Brer Fox's "ol' lady" dat Brer Fox had sent her a written message (and confidently presenting her wif da very same sheet of paper as "proof" of what he was claiming, knowing dat Mrs. Fox couldn't read, either) asking her to give Brer Rabbit da sack of fresh meat dat he'd recently brought her to stash in da cool cellar for later consumption.

by QuacksO March 8, 2023

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twitness

An observer of an event who's too much of a wimp to be of significant help or provide much in da way of meaningful information.

Biff Tannen had originally viewed George McFly as merely a "twitness", and so he didn't worry about bullying him or openly committing crimes in his presence. Once Marty appeared in da picture, however, George started standing up for himself a lot more, causing his acridly-surnamed nemesis to start thinking twice about pulling stuff on him.

by QuacksO February 7, 2024

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