accidental nonce

Someone who ends up in trouble for a specific crime, completely unaware of their actions.

Blimey Guvnor, I didn't realise. I'm not a proper nonce, just an accidental nonce.

by Duwduw January 7, 2019

Jack the Nonce

nonce.

“have u seen jack the nonce?”
“yeah he was watching some 5 year olds”

by nonce9H January 19, 2019

squirrel nonce

Someone who is such a nonce that they are no longer satisfied by children and turn to the next annoying, chubby cheeked thing. The squirrel.

John: Look at how that squirrel’s tail moves!
Barry: Oh John you’re a right squirrel nonce you

by Reesebby October 1, 2018

Nonce lung

When your lung collapse’s because you nonce to much

beanie sounds like you got nonce lung you need to lay off that noncing for a while

by Weary baskin September 1, 2022

Taxi nonce

A taxi driver that slags controllers off, but buys them stuff ie, beer, spirits & doughnuts in return for a decent job

I see that Stephen is on his way to London again with a fare, yes he’s been in the base & dropped off a bottle of brandy the taxi nonce

by Johnb34 March 28, 2022

Nonce aware

Someone who is aware of nonces and is superior in life.

Tilly: I’m nonce aware 😎
Tom: Oh my god can I have your autograph!?
Lily: bonito flakes.

by Granny Gertrude January 21, 2021

Cat nonce

Someone who puts out cat food to enable them to steal someone else cat

Oi Steele please don't cat nonce the next door neighbors cat

by Repro March 29, 2020