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Hovering Alfred

The posture that one takes while attempting to use a public toilet (Gas Station, Grocery Store, Resturaunt, ect...)while trying to avoid making contact with the seat. On occasion with lower pulic toilets, one must also brace them self with one hand against the wall to avoid falling in. Also known as a "Floating Susan" when executed by a female.
They were out of ass gaskets in the stall, So Stan had to attempt a risky "hovering alfred", before he shat himself.
by Scott Kelley September 1, 2008
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Hollering Bench

hollering bench (n): a bench placed outside of a store located in a central location, preferably one frequented by people who look funny or to whom you are attracted to sexually.
"Let's go to the hollering bench at Tasti D-Lite on Bedford Ave. to laugh at people with funny socks and holler at some bitches"
by sleazy aunt sam January 6, 2010
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jan hammering

To play the 1980s synthesizer piece "Crockett's Theme" by Jan Hammer provocatively to pedestrians from a moving vehicle.
Hey Barry, we should totally go out jan hammering.
by E W Cooke April 10, 2010
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hammering thunder sperm

A hammering thunder sperm is:

1) A group of men or women sperming at the same time and screaming at the top of there lungs
Danielle: Ok guys im ready for the hammering thunder sperm HIT ME

Group of men: OH YEAH, IN THE EYE, ITS EVERYWHERE. shit i killed my dog, Get the mop
by Sperm Hammer August 18, 2011
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Hammering the Beets

Male masturbation. Typically, the more vigorous and rough variety. Not just a causal wank.
I walked in on my roommate sitting on the toilet hammering the beets. I wondered what the smacking was.

My uncle paid me $50 to let him watch me hammering the beets.

I’m so sore from hammering the beets. My balls are swollen. I was on pornhub all day.
by Dick Onchin September 23, 2020
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Hog Hammering

A woman who entertains multiple obese men sexually at the same time. Dicks all around.
Linda was caught hog hammering her fathers friends at the crawfish festival.
by Supra man June 24, 2014
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rectal hammering

Rectal hammering, verb, adj, it is when you experience a situation when lots of air rushes out your bum in an air hammer manner, some people that suffer from rectal hammering can experience this hundreds of times in a day.
"OMG these farts are just ripping right out of me", " no dude sounds like you have a bad case of rectal hammering".
by Willy Lickit February 17, 2015
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