faster than a cat can lick its ass

Ever see a cat lick its ass? Then you know it's pretty damn fast.

When I heard my old man coming home right when I was in the middle of some afternoon delight with my next door neighbor, he gathered up his clothes, rock-hard dick and all, and jumped out the window faster than a cat can lick its ass.

by Goobershanker August 9, 2006

fastest man alive

do you mean banderita?

Fastest man alive = banderita

- Did you see fastestmanalive video?

- come on man , ofc i did.

by BanderitaFakeEdition July 24, 2019

fastesfern

Fastesfern is a randomly generated on xbox 360 also me

Hey dude this Fastesfern username is pretty cool

by Fastesfern May 21, 2020

fasterbate

The act of masterbating very quickly as to get it over with to avoid detection

i had to fasterbate because my mom was in the next room

by saylor February 15, 2007

Fatellite

A fat-ass fucker with a neck like a scrotal sack who won't leave you the fuck alone no matter how times you make it blatantly obvious you want nothing to do with him. Orbits people and conversations much like a satellite. No social mores whatsoever.

"I was trying to have a conversation, but Fatellite kept hovering."

by leadbitch July 31, 2009

Faster than the speed of nut

When events are taking place at an incredibly fast pace, similar to when a man is having sex and ejaculates much ealier than expected.

"How are they moving in together already? Their relationship is moving faster than the speed of nut!"

by Monkey Jane January 12, 2017

Honey, I never drive faster than I can see

Telling your girlfriend you'll never cheat on her.

"Oh, sure; your roommate is adorable... but. Honey, I never drive faster than I can see."

by JormanThoad September 1, 2017