Asshole Recognition System (ARS)

The Asshole Recognition System (ARS) is a futuristic bidtech (bidet technology) leveraging AI and image recognition to ensure a hands-free, paperless toileting experience. Incorporating Precision Fecal Targeting (PFT) as well as Adaptive Butt Monitoring (ABM) the Asshole Recognition System is able to achieve an impressive 99.5% Shit Elimination Ratio (SER).

My ass was so swollen and wrecked from aggressive wiping, but now is ridiculously clean and ready to take on any challenge of the day. Thank you Asshole Recognition System (ARS)!

by CleanAssLover April 29, 2025

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asshole weed

when an inmate shoved weed up their up their anus into their rectum so it doesn’t come out for their cough test

hey guys i coughed so hard and my asshole weed didn’t come out, i’m amazed! i don’t even know where the lighter went!

by crustydiscarge69 February 4, 2021

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Five foot asshole

A five foot walkway is generally the width of a walkway during the British colonial era, be it a sheltered corridor or otherwise. However, the width can vary, but still be called a "five foot walkway".

In this context, an inconsiderate asshole who walks in such a way to take up most of the walkway as to make others have to squeeze past them on the walkway so as not to step into a drain or against a barrier that are on the sides.

Most of the time, these assholes walk side by side in groups, and others have to keep saying "excuse me" in order to get past the blockage.

Man: Damn those three skinny girls make that 12 foot wide pathway look so damn squeezy. The heck they think they are?

Woman: Tsk... Each of those girls is a five foot asshole.

by BShigure January 27, 2011

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