Left Lane Jackass (LLJ): A person driving in the left lane on a highway either at the speed limit or usually slightly below the limit AND the following conditions are present: 1) Another car or cars is behind them wanting to go faster; 2) The person driving is completely unaware of his or her surroundings.
The following conditions are not necessary for the definition, but are frequently observed: There is a blinker flashing and the driver is completely unaware of it and has no intention of changing lanes, and 2) The driver may be talking on a cell phone, putting on make-up, or daydreaming.
Supporting evidence includes: The drivers behind the LLJ appear pissed off, and 2) drivers behind the LLJ are usually tail-gaiting and flashing their lights, however, this usually has no effect, due to condition #2 of the definition.
The following conditions are not necessary for the definition, but are frequently observed: There is a blinker flashing and the driver is completely unaware of it and has no intention of changing lanes, and 2) The driver may be talking on a cell phone, putting on make-up, or daydreaming.
Supporting evidence includes: The drivers behind the LLJ appear pissed off, and 2) drivers behind the LLJ are usually tail-gaiting and flashing their lights, however, this usually has no effect, due to condition #2 of the definition.
Passenger: "Hey, is there a traffic jam ahead?"
Driver: No, it's another left lane jackass.
Passenger: Just get a little closer to him, I'm sure he'll move over when he notices us.
Driver: He's frigging clueless, and doesn't even know that I'm 12 inches from his bumper. I think he's talking on his cell phone.
Driver: No, it's another left lane jackass.
Passenger: Just get a little closer to him, I'm sure he'll move over when he notices us.
Driver: He's frigging clueless, and doesn't even know that I'm 12 inches from his bumper. I think he's talking on his cell phone.
by MeDavebo September 29, 2014
Get the left lane jackass mug.by suksha February 2, 2024
Get the lucid acid jackass mug.Phrase. Identifying. A individual who always gives "advice" or graces others with there "superior intellect" in a loud annoying way that is common sense(or should be) or has already been stated but now they will say it again in a different tone as if it was never heard or said (short term memory recall), this advice or information is usually given after something has been decided/discussed making the individual feel as though they solved everything and/or nothing would have been decided/done/gained hadnt they "spoken up" these individuals must always have the last word even days later and just a sound; Captain Jackass is not a nick name, this phrase is only use in the type of situation/moment it refers. Traditionally once the individual starts "the thing of it is" speech they are allowed to finish, making this phrase more appropriate as "stupid" doesnt know when to stop once they are pleased with themselves (or youve had enough)give them eye contact and firmly state "THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!!" Adding a "WELL" in front of the phrase to interrupt is optional; Hopefully there is room for reinforcing/retraining the simple minded brain that the knowledge they DO have is basic at best n adults are talking now, If not you have just learn a wonderful new phrase thats perfect when used properly every time!
1: Did you know if you stand in the road you could get hit by a car?.....Yah i know
2: WELL THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!! You are a true asset to mankind......scholar to your peers n such ...
1: What ... Captain peers, like captain Malibu honey ...dbdjf....ddfd.. yah i drink that..
2: You want me to hit you with the newspaper again .... ima get it ...
1: Iam going to the bank in the moring because they are closed after 12pm and I n....
*LOUD INTERRUPTING STUPIDITY*
2: You should go to the bank 1st in the morning remeber they close at 12pm and yo....THE THING OF IT IS my sisters brothers half dogs cusin pet trees gmas worked at the bank makr short story long now they owe me money so they say if you give me your money then ill givejz fieobdbdjrvjfndbwhdjdktnfj dd fkd and ..
3: *WITH THE ASSIST* THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS! WE GOT IT !!
1: Thanks bruh I couldnt take it all that gibberish....its like she making words with ABC magnets ...but THEY JUST BANANA STICKERS! .... i owe you
3: Yep ..you sure do sir ..sure do....Ill add it to your BroTab
2: *Talking to self* Oh uh PEE...Thats what i had ment to say i gottda dpeiplldbdbh....
2: WELL THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS!! You are a true asset to mankind......scholar to your peers n such ...
1: What ... Captain peers, like captain Malibu honey ...dbdjf....ddfd.. yah i drink that..
2: You want me to hit you with the newspaper again .... ima get it ...
1: Iam going to the bank in the moring because they are closed after 12pm and I n....
*LOUD INTERRUPTING STUPIDITY*
2: You should go to the bank 1st in the morning remeber they close at 12pm and yo....THE THING OF IT IS my sisters brothers half dogs cusin pet trees gmas worked at the bank makr short story long now they owe me money so they say if you give me your money then ill givejz fieobdbdjrvjfndbwhdjdktnfj dd fkd and ..
3: *WITH THE ASSIST* THANK YOU CAPTAIN JACKASS! WE GOT IT !!
1: Thanks bruh I couldnt take it all that gibberish....its like she making words with ABC magnets ...but THEY JUST BANANA STICKERS! .... i owe you
3: Yep ..you sure do sir ..sure do....Ill add it to your BroTab
2: *Talking to self* Oh uh PEE...Thats what i had ment to say i gottda dpeiplldbdbh....
by ScreenDoor-Junkie July 6, 2022
Get the Captain Jackass mug.by user270305 September 22, 2019
Get the Jackass mug.Person who executes the dumbest actions with such proficiency, observers are frozen in awe and are unable to reproduce such actions without extensive practice or training.
Turning the the wrong way on to a "One Way" street, on the phone and cursing the folks who got it right. That's a Pro Jackass, you can't be that dumb without practice and dedication.
by TZA_Unlimited May 12, 2011
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by Him the third May 16, 2025
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