wank

Advertise companies by posting their backlinks, despite not being a bot or an employee.

I make money nowadays wanking. No, not in the British sense - I post backlinks to companies in exchange for equity.

by jzekyll March 31, 2021

Birthday Wank

An Evening of Masturbation on one's birthday to celebrate the conceivement of one's self.

Mate: yo man you wanna go out tonight for your birthday?

You: sorry man I'm having a birthday wank tonight

by 69420candice69420 February 22, 2023

rank wank

wanking to material you would usually find to be 'rank', or disgusting, but still managing to finish

Friend 1: I watched a porno last night where a pregnant chick was getting fucked anally against a brick wall, and then she went into labour.
Friend 2: Wow, that sounds disgusting.
Friend 1: Yeah, it was a pretty rank wank.

by kingbiscuit December 25, 2012

Test Wank

The act of checking the captain is awake after having a skin full. Usually in a pub toilet.

The good lady wife says I'm on a promise and I've had 8 gins. I'm off for a test wank

by Paul A Radcliffe May 23, 2023

wank on the beach

when you don’t have all the ingredients for sex on the beach ,settle for what you’ve already got, have a wank on the beach

Bro can you give me another wank on the beach, it’s so good!?!?

by CocktailKing67 October 13, 2025

fruit wank

When you wankmasturbatewith a piece of fruit. A popular choice for this activity is the watermelon. People usually bore a whole into the fruit to create a makeshift pussy and then proceed to insert they're penis inside and pleasure themselves

Jane - "I have heard rumours that Johnny carved a hole in a melon and then Fucked it last week"

Mike - "yeah, he told me about it yesterday apparently it was the best fruit wank he's ever had"

by Fuckmegently August 31, 2015

sand wank

When a male pleasure's oneself by using sandpaper between their palms and member.

"Jimmy did a sand wank as she wanted to know what a 90 year old lady would feel like during sex"

by GollumBoy September 10, 2016