umbrella bitch

Someone who seeks out a relationship only because they're feeling depressed; similar to a sugar baby, but they desire emotional comfort rather than wealth

I dunno, we were pretty close right after my parents broke up, but I've barely talked to her recently. I think I'm just an umbrella bitch

by gracious fallacious January 9, 2023

Apology Umbrella

A declaration of apology stated by the individual preceding future infractions. Most commonly used in romantic relationships to excuse derogatory comments, masochistic tendencies, and general inconsiderations to avoid denial of sexual intercourse.

She was mad when I slapped her ass in front of my boys, but I used my Apology Umbrella so I'm still gonna tap that tonight.

by Macon Love April 26, 2011

Love Umbrella

A gut so big that your SO can give you oral sex in the rain and still stay dry.

It was pouring outside when my woman gave me oral sex. She stayed dry because my love umbrella covered her.

by Jenkum DeCoux December 18, 2010

Columbus Umbrella

The Columbus Umbrella is when you have intercourse with at least 2 other people and you urinate on one person, using their body to shield the other person from said urine.

Jeremy was so excited to get a Columbus Umbrella and protect Donald from my urine .

by Mr. Bungles June 8, 2022