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Goldfish

The cheese-flavored snack that supposedly smiles back, but tends to vary in that regard. Some Goldfish are all smiles, but others appear to have no smile at all. Interesting.

The original is usually the best, and with Goldfish, that is no exception. The "flavor blasted" varieties are absolutely disgusting, and the person who thought that making pizza-flavored crackers shaped like fish was absolutely fucked in the head.

Goldfish are promoted by a band of anthropomorphic fish, which are thoroughly annoying, and somewhat detract from the enjoyment of the crackers. The leader of this band of fish is named "Finn" (Ha Ha), and is somehow able to wear sunglasses, despite having eyes on the side of his head, and having no nose. He is also joined by other fish, one of which is named "X-Treme". I can only assume that he was born in the 90's. X-Treme also represents the 'Flavor blasted" variety, which happens to be the exact reason why I despise X-Treme.

The crackers are produced by Pepperidge Farms, and sold internationally. They are quite good. In fact, I am eating some at this moment (the original flavor, duh).
Person- "you want some Goldfish?'
Me- "Hell yeas"
Person- (Pours Goldfish into my hands)
In unison- "The snack that smiles back!"
by Supreme_Sucks March 23, 2017
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The Solo Goldfish

The Solo Goldfish is a YouTuber based in the United States. He creates videos of things such as Minecraft videos and short films, as well as lots of random media like the "french fry video". Sometimes known as The Lonely Goldfish, this small influencer has a series called the Think Tank, in which he rants about literally anything. Take, for example, his video on why segregation is good IN A FANTASY SETTING. See, The Goldfish is not an ordinary YT content creator, he's funny, clever, and intellectual.
John McWhite-Guy: Who tf is The Solo Goldfish???
Me: A YouTuber who makes the funniest sh-t on the platform.
by 773. April 20, 2023
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Very-Sad Goldfish

A Wannabe YouTuber who hasn't posted anything on his channel yet but I'm still subscribed to for some reason.
Dude 1: "Hey man, I see your still subscribed to Very-Sad Goldfish. Can I ask why?"
Dude 2: " I HONESTLY DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHY! I TOLD YOU THAT LAST WEEK!"
by Someone_Named_Joshua November 2, 2020
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angry goldfish

Oral sex performed with a mouthful of chewed up crackers, preferably of the goldfish brand, but any cracker will work
That freak gave me an angry goldfish! She salty as fuck!
by Pauljamal May 7, 2018
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Goldfish

A cracker shaped like a fish with different flavors such as sour cream and onion poiuzza cheese bbq and more.
Do you have any goldfish?
by foodie_gal March 18, 2017
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GoldFish Memory Emo

When someone says something you don't understand. When you complain about things then don't know what the other person is trying to say.
"Ugh Haley and Chloe. I just can't with you GoldFish Memory emos" -oscar
by GOD AND MOSES November 6, 2017
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