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Purity Guardian

/ˈpyʊrɪti ˈɡɑ rdiən/ noun

1. A self-appointed enforcer of perceived moral or sexual purity, often found lurking in religious households, youth groups, or conservative communities.
2. A person (often a parent, leader, or elder sibling) who monitors the behavior, thoughts, clothing, and friendships of others in the name of holiness.

Common behaviors:
Frequently asks, “Who were you with?” and “What were you wearing?”

Monitors text messages, crushes, and clothing length with the intensity of a federal agent.

Believes human intimacy is dangerous until legally and heterosexually sanctified
“I couldn’t even go to the movies without my purity guardian accusing me of leading boys astray.”
by benchurch15 May 27, 2025
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Guardian Reader

Marxist fool incapable of processing information and reads to Guardian to remain insulated in his stupid. A cross between Harold Shipman and Coco the Clown, with the core Marxist beliefs of Hitler or Lenin
No way would the Guardian Reader attempt to live in a socialist paradise like China or North Korea. Or use soap.
by Maggie T April 3, 2024
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Guardian of the royal bowels

Another term for a royal physician, or doctor

Found on Wikipedia’s timeline of medicine and medical technology that discusses an inscription Egyptian physician known as Iry who was also considered the eye-doctor of the palace, palace physician of the belly, and he who prepares the important medicine and knows the juices of the body.

For a non-doctor example and a similar job, see: Groom of the Stool
King Arthur: Ugh, my stomach is bothering me again.
Sir Henry: Should I call for the Guardian of the Royal Bowels then, sire?

King Arthur: Do it quickly, I don’t have all day! I have a kingdom to rule over.
by Reshithewhite February 27, 2024
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Meme guardian

A meme guardian: a guardian designed to protect the universe, assigned with a partner.

They protect the avatar using the power of memes

There are 5 guardians. Smg0, smg1, smg2, smg3, and smg4.
(6 if you count Niles)
“I am a meme guardian. My name is smg4,

I’m the 5th meme guardian.
by Arand75 March 28, 2024
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