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Steve’s Theorem

“There is an inverse relationship between how much you care about the body of your car and how well you treat other people
Man: Wow that Steve sure does take good care of his 1992 Mustang.

Other man: Yeah but he won’t let anyone touch it and everyone thinks he’s a dick. Classic example of Steve’s Theorem.
by the notorious swish May 22, 2020
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Infinite Funny Theorem

1. When you create a new funny via forgetting the original funny, thus theoretically creating a source of infinite funny; When humor originates from the setup of a joke but the punchline being forgotten in a comedic fashion

2. The Scientific Theory that, if an immortal monkey spent all of eternity clicking on random keys on a keyboard, it would eventually write every joke that could possibly be conceived.
Rick: "Hey, I heard a funny joke the other day! So, a Tibetan Monk walks into a bar in order to observe the lifestyle of people living in a first world country and an urban setting, and then-"
Vick: "Wow, he walked into a bar? That must've hurt!"
Rick: "Haha, you fucking moron, that's not what I meant you failed excuse of a human being."
Vick: "So... where's the funny?"
Rick: "Oh, I forgot I was supposed to be telling a joke-"
Vick: "Hah! You forgot the funny!"
Rick: "No, it's the infinite funny theorem. By forgetting the funny, I've created another funny."
Vick: "Wow, that's pretty funny!"
Pause for laughter. If it does not ensue, then your friends are not based enough.
by Based Guitar December 20, 2020
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Central Billing Theorem

In simulation theory, the central billing theorem states that any simulation of the universe where people still have to pay their bills is indistinguishable from the real universe.
Who cares if the universe is a simulation?! I still gotta pay my damn bills! Your ass never heard of the Central Billing Theorem?!
by epluribusnihilo August 16, 2024
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Jordan Curve Theorem

The Jordan curve theorem states that a non-self intersecting continuous loop in the plane(i.e. a Jordan Curve) divides the plane into an interior and exterior region.

To prove the theorem, we shall us proof by fucking obviousness. It's a closed loop, of course there's going to be an outside and inside. Humans have been making borders and fences for millenia and this still needs to be proven?? What am I supposed to say? It's so bloody obvious!
It's like trying to prove 1+1=2. Why the fuck is this even a theorem? Not even worth to be a Lemma or Corollary tbh. This trivial ass bitch.
"Yo man, you heard of Jordan Curve Theorem? How do I prove it for our upcoming exam", asked John, he was found dead, cut in 25 pieces, by the police after 4 days.
by geno singh March 12, 2024
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Created in 2021, the Vaccarella Theorem of Quadrilaterals places an emphasis on the vagueness which can be applied to everyday examples. A rectangle, in terms of quadrilaterals, is a specific parallelogram in which each pair of adjacent sides is perpendicular. On the contrary, squares are regular quadrilaterals that have four equal sides, along with four right angles. Using this information, one can identify that squares have more specific conditions than rectangles. Moreover, all squares are rectangles, but not all rectangles are squares. This means that squares can be viewed as the less vague topic in any situation, due to them being less likely to occur in the world of quadrilaterals. On the other hand, Rectangles can be seen as the more vague topic, due to them requiring less conditions to exist. One could use this when analyzing any given situation. For example, if one was to look at the issue of poverty within the United States, the Vaccarella Theorem of Quadrilaterals could be applied by saying that the general issue of poverty is the rectangle, whereas the issue of homelessness could be seen as the square. The Vaccarella Theorem of Quadrilaterals goes further than just rectangles and squares, and if needed, one can apply even more quadrilaterals to further differentiate parts of a situation, by simply increasing the complexity of quadrilaterals and adding them to the comparison.
"That was a crazy game, too bad the defense played so bad. I was just thinking about the Vaccarella Theorem of Quadrilaterals. The whole team was pretty bad today actually, it's like the team as a whole was the rectangle, but that one turnover in the fourth quarter was definitely the square."
by Beetlejesus November 9, 2021
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Moon Theorem

It states that the angle the moon makes with two stars is at 90° and the stars are at angles 30° and 60° respectively, therefore making it a triangle.
I watched the moon theorem with my love
by That Gee December 20, 2022
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The Montourian Theorem

A theorem created by Harrison Montour on March 22, 2024
X*9+X+9=X9
This theorem works with any Positive, Whole number.
6 times 9 plus 6 plus 9 equals 69 is an example of The Montourian Theorem where X=6
by Scooter08 March 22, 2024
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